


Chaotic Gay Mistake™️

by wing_dingding



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/F, How Do I Tag, M/M, Manga Spoilers, another hq chat fic, help me, i honestly dont know where this is going, it comes and goes and then comes back strong, karasuno first year chat, kenhina bc i need to spread my kenhina agenda, kenhina is like an ongoing thing, like an ocean?, like i hint at it a lot, no plot just first years, other group chats too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:47:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 26,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25074838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wing_dingding/pseuds/wing_dingding
Summary: dino boy: Purple is an M&M color, geniuskags: Its not thoughanxious angel: no, wait it isyoosung: Is it? I’ve never seen purple M&M’sshort king #3: a color in the regular m&m bag no special skins or dlcsdino boy: Did you just call purple M&M’s DLCs?Hinata makes a Karasuno first year group chat, which turns out to be a horrible, horrible mistake.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Kageyama Tobio & Tsukishima Kei & Yachi Hitoka & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Shimizu Kiyoko/Yachi Hitoka, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi, but like iwaoi daisuga and kiyoyachi are so minor and background, it's mostly established tsukkiyama and kenhina, oh and background bokuaka that makes appearances every so often
Comments: 166
Kudos: 394





	1. and it begins

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this is my first time posting fanfiction in a while and my first time posting on AO3, so I'm still learning how to tag and stuff. A lot of this is pre-written, so there will be frequent updates, most likely, but don't expect too much just yet.

**Hinata Shoyou added Yachi Hitoka, Kageyama Tobio, and 2 others**

**Hinata Shoyou renamed the chat to ‘COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA’**

Tsukishima Kei: I am leaving

Kageyama Tobio: Coward

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Hinata! Rename the chat to something nicer!

Hinata Shouyou: but its tru

Tsukishima Kei: The way you type will give my eyes cancer

Yachi Hitoka: you already have glasses, can it get worse?

Yachi Hitoka: oh no that sounds really mean!

Hinata Shouyou: PFFFT

Kageyama Tobio: Lol

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Tsukki’s eyesight isn’t that bad!

Yamaguchi Tadashi: But no yeah you did get roasted Tsukki

Tsukishima Kei: Shut up, Yamaguchi

**Tsukishima Kei has left the chat**

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Do I still say it?

Kageyama Tobio: Huh??

Yachi Hitoka: do it, do it-

Hinata Shouyou: no wait i can add him back

**Hinata Shoyou has added Tsukishima Kei**

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Sorry, Tsukki

Hinata Shouyou: k now leave

Tsukishima Kei: You seriously had to add me back just so Yamaguchi could say that?

Yamaguchi Tadashi: No!

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Please stay!

Tsukishima Kei: ….

Tsukishima Kei: Fine

Yachi Hitoka: it’s that easy?

Hinata Shouyou: ur a simp

Kageyama Tobio: Dont you simp for the little giant?

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Don’t worry, Hinata, I have some aloe

**Yachi Hitoka renamed Yamaguchi Tadashi to ‘aloe carrier’**

aloe carrier: Next time you need aloe, you won’t be getting it

Kageyama Tobio: Dont give any to Tsukishima either

Tsukishima Kei: Why am I here if you guys are just going to act like children?

Hinata Shouyou: u kno im the oldest right

**Tsukishima Kei renamed Hinata Shoyou to ‘iM tHe OlDeSt’**

aloe carrier: Oh no! Hinata, do you need more aloe??

iM tHe OlDeSt: im gonna bring aloe to practice and stick it down ur throat tsukishima

Tsukishima Kei: Are you also bringing a ladder?

aloe carrier: Hinata, I only have so much aloe

Kageyama Tobio: Its ok

Kageyama Tobio: I can do it for him

Tsukishima Kei: Bring a ladder?

Yachi Hitoka: you guys need sum milk

Kageyama Tobio: I am ok with having some milk

aloe carrier: You seem like the type of person who drinks milk straight out of the carton

aloe carrier: No offense

Kageyama Tobio: ….

Kageyama Tobio: I do???

iM tHe OlDeSt: um tf

Tsukishima Kei: You don’t deserve rights, Kageyama

Yachi Hitoka: you don’t put like, chocolate sauce in it?

Yachi Hitoka: or at least sugar???

Yachi Hitoka: something????

Kageyama Tobio: If regular milk is out i take strawberry

aloe carrier: Oh, a valid opinion. I was getting a bit scared that your brain was made up of volleyball and idiocy, but I guess that’s just the majority of it

iM tHe OlDeSt: u rlly hate regular milk huh

Tsukishima Kei: How are you going to get aloe now, king?

Kageyama Tobio: I’ll get ointment.

Yachi Hitoka: you will?

Kageyama Tobio: Yeah i guess

Yachi Hitoka: every time?

Kageyama Tobio: Since i cant trust Yamaguchi maybe yeah

Yachi Hitoka: ok

**Yachi Hitoka has renamed Kageyama Tobio to ‘ointment bearer’**

iM tHe OlDeSt: whats that??

Tsukishima Kei: Ointment?

iM tHe OlDeSt: no the other thing

ointment bearer: Dumbass

iM tHe OlDeSt: k then what is it yamayama

Tsukishima Kei: It’s been four minutes

Tsukishima Kei: Don’t strain yourself, you know you need that braincell if you want to be a good setter

aloe carrier: Kageyama, do you want some-

ointment bearer: Shut up Tsukishima

Yachi Hitoka: did….

Yachi Hitoka: did you want me to tell you what it means?

iM tHe OlDeSt: pls tell me

ointment bearer: She didnt ask you

aloe carrier: This is a group chat, you’ll both get the answer either way

iM tHe OlDeSt: nuh uh i can pm her

ointment bearer: So can i!

iM tHe OlDeSt: yea but she likes me better

ointment bearer: Yeah but you’re a dumbass

iM tHe OlDeSt: yachi who do you like better???

aloe carrier: Hey, Kageyama, did you want some aloe? This isn’t going to burn, but I can’t give much

Tsukishima Kei: Don’t give it to him

Tsukishima Kei: Let it happen

Yachi Hitoka: i feel bad, please give it to him

ointment bearer: I dont want anything just please tell the meaning of one fucking word

ointment bearer: Its been 25 minutes

Tsukishima Kei: Just search it up, idiot

iM tHe OlDeSt: ok he can search it up but please tell me yachi

aloe carrier: Please PM Hinata and don’t tell Kageyama, that would be hilarious

ointment bearer: Im going to block three of you

Yachi Hitoka: thank you

ointment bearer: What are you talking about? Im blocking you too 

aloe carrier: Yachi, I’m afraid that I’m your only source of healing

iM tHe OlDeSt: ok that sounds a bit weird

Tsukishima Kei: Shut up

iM tHe OlDeSt: simp

aloe carrier: Kageyama’s the simp, he literally is blocking everyone but Hinata

iM tHe OlDeSt: ur a simp too

aloe carrier: what how

ointment bearer: You both are simps for each other and its gross

iM tHe OlDeSt: im surprised there isnt more pda

Tsukishima Kei: I doubt you even know what PDA stands for

aloe carrier: I’m not giving aloe to Hinata anymore

iM tHe OlDeSt: it stands for public displays of allergies

iM tHe OlDeSt: im not stupid tsukishima

Yachi Hitoka: oh my god, tears are actually falling

iM tHe OlDeSt: im sorry!!! what did i do??

Tsukishima Kei: Please, no one say anything

ointment bearer: I dont get it

ointment bearer: What did he do

aloe carrier: Absolutely nothing

iM tHe OlDeSt: what is a bearer?!?!?

  
  


**Private chat with Yamaguchi and Hinata**

Yamaguchi: A bearer is the same thing as a carrier. To bear something is the same thing as carrying something. 

Yamaguchi: Please go along with this

Hinata: what??

**COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA**

aloe carrier: Okay, fine.

aloe carrier: Bearer is a person who is sexually attracted to ointment

Tsukishima Kei: Shut up, Yamaguchi

Tsukishima Kei: You weren’t supposed to tell him

aloe carrier: Sorry, Tsukki

Yachi Hitoka: i-

ointment bearer: Really?

iM tHe OlDeSt: i think its true

iM tHe OlDeSt: i searched it up

ointment bearer: Oh

ointment bearer: How do you change your name?

Tsukishima Kei: Go to the three dots by the chat name

**ointment bearer is calling…**

**ointment bearer has ended the call**

ointment bearer: I pressed the wrong thing

Tsukishima Kei: Yeah

Tsukishima Kei: I can see 

aloe carrier: Pfft

Tsukishima Kei: Okay, press the three dots

Tsukishima Kei: Then press group details

ointment bearer: Okay….

aloe carrier: You should be able to see the chat name and everyone in it

ointment bearer: Yeah

Tsukishima Kei: Ok, then at the very top, there’s three or four options

Tsukishima Kei: If you press the second one, the keyboard will pop up and you can change your name

ointment bearer: Ok

**ointment bearer has left the chat**

Yachi Hitoka: yamaguchi, i can’t believe you were part of that

iM tHe OlDeSt: no wait i wanna add him back

**iM tHe OlDeSt has added ointment bearer**

ointment bearer: fuck you

Tsukishima Kei: Is that any way to treat your royal servants?

**iM tHe OlDeSt has renamed Tsukishima Kei to ‘yama’s servant’**

Yachi Hitoka: i know you mean kageyama but i thought you meant yamaguchi for a minute

yama’s servant: I would rather be Yamaguchi’s slave than be a paid servant for Kageyama

Yachi Hitoka: you kinda already are

ointment bearer: Im not giving ointment to you

aloe carrier: It’s okay, I can give you aloe, Tsukki

yama’s servant: Shut up, Yamaguchi

aloe carrier: Sorry Tsukki…

aloe carrier: As my servant, you should be more respectful. I will not shut up

iM tHe OlDeSt: oof hows it feel tsukishima

**yama’s servant has renamed to ‘Tsukishima Kei’**

iM tHe OlDeSt: boring

iM tHe OlDeSt: youre like a normal guy

Tsukishima Kei: I will strangle your small body and dump it into an ocean

aloe carrier: Woah there, he needs a trigger warning for that one

iM tHe OlDeSt: im not gonna ask

iM tHe OlDeSt: i gotta go watch my sister 

iM tHe OlDeSt: bye bye

ointment bearer: I have to go too

Tsukishima Kei: Thank God

aloe carrier: lol

aloe carrier: Tsukki, wanna go to the park?

Tsukishima Kei: Ok

Tsukishima Kei: We can meet up at the convenience store and get a snack

aloe carrier: Ok! 

Yachi Hitoka: well, bye then

Yachi Hitoka: leave me to rot alone

aloe carrier: ….Did you want to come with us?

Yachi Hitoka: no, i’ll feel awkward when the sexual tension rises

Tsukishima Kei: I’m already on my way, Yamaguchi

aloe carrier: Ok, Tsukki!!

Yachi Hitoka: ok, bye!


	2. oooOOoooO SEIJOH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iwaizumi: I will strangle everyone here
> 
> shittykawa: you always say u will
> 
> shittykawa: btw wheres makki
> 
> iM tHe OlDeSt: ur mom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this? Another update? Yup! I have absolutely nothing else to do! Also, this chapter is super long, which I did not anticipate.  
> Btw, thanks to the people who commented and stuff!

**COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA**

iM tHe OlDeSt: i gotta idea

Tsukishima Kei: Oh my God, do you ever shut up?

Yachi Hitoka: What is it?

iM tHe OlDeSt: we should add a senpai from another school and confuse them so we can stun them the next time we see them

aloe carrier: That sounds like it will either be extremely funny or end in Sugawara-san murdering us

Tsukishima Kei: I hate to say this, but I think I would be present for that

Tsukishima Kei: I’d like to torture a third year

ointment bearer: You and Yachi have to change your names

Yachi Hitoka: i can do that!

aloe carrier: Make sure it’s something that doesn’t give it away

iM tHe OlDeSt: yeah like dont put blonde or glasses in the name because it narrows it down

Tsukishima Kei: I know, I’m not an idiot like you

Tsukishima Kei: We have to change the chat name, too. It has my name in it

**aloe carrier renamed Tsukishima Kei to ‘dino boy’**

aloe carrier: Perfect. Not too obvious, but definitely accurate.

dino boy: whatever

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed Yachi Hitoka to ‘anxious angel’**

anxious angel: thanks, hinata

ointment bearer: Wont the previous messages be there?

aloe carrier: Hinata made the group chat, right?

aloe carrier: Just change the settings so that previous messages won’t be available. We can turn them back on afterwards

iM tHe OlDeSt: ok

**Previous messages are no longer visible**

ointment bearer: Wait!

ointment bearer: You cant do it if we dont know who is being added!

ointment bearer: You idiot! Change it back!

iM tHe OlDeSt: AHH OK OK JEEZ

**Previous messages are visible**

anxious angel: what school do we wanna do?

iM tHe OlDeSt: we cant do shiratorizawa

iM tHe OlDeSt: i dont know any of the third years contact info

iM tHe OlDeSt: i only have goshiki

dino boy: We can’t do Nekoma or Fukurodani. They already know us too well

aloe carrier: We are not doing Johzenji

ointment bearer: We probably have to do someone from Miyagi since Tokyo and other prefectures either know us well or don’t know us at all and are unreachable

anxious angel: maybe not date tech though?

iM tHe OlDeSt: oh! seijoh! duh!

ointment bearer: No

dino boy: What, king? Can’t handle a pretty boy setter?

ointment bearer: Shut the fuck up

aloe carrier: Woah there partner

aloe carrier: It’ll be fine, Kageyama. They don’t know who’s who. 

aloe carrier: You can be as mean as you want

anxious angel: i’m good with seijoh!

iM tHe OlDeSt: we should do the great king! Or should we see if we can add ALL the third years?

dino boy: I doubt you even know how to contact a singular third year from Seijoh, let alone all of them.

iM tHe OlDeSt: not true! i can get oikawa’s from daichi since they have a captain group chat!

anxious angel: daichi will also have the rest of them, too!

dino boy: Hinata, you can’t ask Daichi.

iM tHe OlDeSt: u challenging me??? i can do it supidshima!

dino boy: Not that I don’t doubt you or anything, but I’m not challenging you.

dino boy: He’ll be suspicious if you ask because you’re you

ointment bearer: Yea thats true

anxious angel: you probably can’t do it either, kageyama

anxious angel: you and hinata have too much of a reputation

ointment bearer: Tsukishima asking is also going to be suspicious though since he usually puts so much effort into being useless

iM tHe OlDeSt: then its yamaguchi or yachi

dino boy: If Daichi saw Yachi, a first year manager, trying to contact all of Seijoh’s third years, what would you think?

iM tHe OlDeSt: you couldve just said yachi would be suspicious too jeez

aloe carrier: I mean, I guess I can do it

aloe carrier: Did you guys want to see? I can do it in the group chat with everyone

dino boy: No, you can just ask Daichi directly. Say something like you want to get tips from them or something

iM tHe OlDeSt: u can say that one of them promised to talk to you and you don’t know their name

dino boy: Not only is one of them the captain and another is the ace, but they all have such distinctive traits. You could narrow them down, but you probably couldn’t tell since you can’t see them as well due to your short stature.

iM tHe OlDeSt: i didnt even do anything wtf

ointment bearer: Just go with the first thing

aloe carrier: Ok! I’ll tell you how it goes!

  
  


**Chat with Yamaguchi and Daichi**

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Hey, Daichi-san?

Daichi Sawamura: What’s up?

Yamaguchi Tadashi: I wanted to ask some Miyagi third years for help with serving and receiving. Do you think I could have the contact information for the Seijoh third years?

Daichi Sawamura: I can’t promise they’ll help you if you just ask, but I can give you their contact information.

Daichi Sawamura: Do you want me to tell them you asked? I can tell Oikawa or Iwaizumi.

Yamaguchi Tadashi: No

Yamaguchi Tadashi: I can tell them.

Daichi Sawamura: Ok, but if they won't do anything, I can get Kuroo or Bokuto to help you instead. 

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Thanks, Daichi-san!

**COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA**

aloe carrier: Let’s change the chat name and then disable previous messages.

aloe carrier: I got all four of the Seijoh third years

ointment bearer: Ok

anxious angel: good job, yamaguchi!

dino boy: Please don’t change the name to something stupid.

ointment bearer: That means you cant change it since anything you say is stupid

iM tHe OlDeSt: wait i wanna change it

anxious angel: make sure it’s something random

aloe carrier: Yeah, something without volleyball, first years, crows, or Karasuno in it

dino boy: Just make it a random emoticon, that won’t give anything away

ointment bearer: Make sure it isnt an ugly one

iM tHe OlDeSt: calm down! i can do it!

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed the chat ‘ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ’**

**Previous messages are no longer visible**

**aloe carrier added Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime, and two others**

Iwaizumi Hajime: What is this?

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed Iwaizumi Hajime to ‘Iwaizumi’**

iM tHe OlDeSt: nice and short

dino boy: One of those relates to you

aloe carrier: Nice one

anxious angel: are the other people online?

ointment bearer: They probably are just going to leave the chat

Iwaizumi: Who are you guys?

dino boy: dino boy

aloe carrier: I carry aloe

iM tHe OlDeSt: im the oldest

anxious angel: i’m anxious and an angel

ointment bearer: i bear ointment

dino boy: Did you actually search it up?

ointment bearer: Obviously

ointment bearer: Im not stupid

iM tHe OlDeSt: sure

Oikawa Tooru: owo what’s this

Iwaizumi: I know you did this Shittykawa!

dino boy: Watch your fucking mouth. Don’t swear in this damn group chat, asshole!

aloe carrier: Yeah, what the fuck you guys?

ointment bearer: Acting like fucking children

anxious angel: frick!

iM tHe OlDeSt: woah! calm down there!

Oikawa Tooru: i don’t know these people!

anxious angel: i feel like a side chick now

aloe carrier: I thought we were something

dino boy: He’s just going to act like he doesn’t know us….

ointment bearer: After everything

iM tHe OlDeSt: dont we mean anything to you???

Oikawa Tooru: are you fans or something????

**dino boy renamed Oikawa Tooru to ‘shittykawa’**

Iwaizumi: They obviously aren’t fans, you dumbass!

Iwaizumi: Mattsun and Makki probably made the first and second years do something again

shittykawa: idc what mattsun and makki did

shittykawa: i’m gonna serve a ball in the face of whoever renamed me

dino boy: I’m terrified of the virtual volleyball

shittykawa: are you kunimi???

dino boy: I don’t know

dino boy: If i have to be Kunimi and all the third year spots are taken, what are you guys?

aloe carrier: I know anxious angel is probably the libero or that second year

ointment bearer: No theyre all supid dont compare anxious angel to any of them

iM tHe OlDeSt: lmao

shittykawa: i’m taking everything you say as a personal attack

ointment bearer: Good because it is

Iwaizumi: Seriously, who the fuck are you people?

iM tHe OlDeSt: uhm he cursed??

shittykawa: gasp

shittykawa: iwa chan!!

Matsukawa Issei: lol wtf is this

Iwaizumi: Where are you

aloe carrier: Who are you talking to?

Iwaizumi: I don’t care who replies, everyone is facing consequences

iM tHe OlDeSt: oooh~

dino boy: Hoe don’t do it

iM tHe OlDeSt: are you gonna punish us ;)

ointment bearer: Hey Im gonna go to your house with knife and fucking kill you you damn fool

anxious angel: hey, i’m kinda scared of the two of you now.

anxious angel: friendship ended with iM tHe OlDeSt. i only know aloe carrier

Matsukawa Issei: i like the memes here

Matsukawa Issei: i’ll stay

Iwaizumi: I will strangle everyone here

shittykawa: you always say u will

shittykawa: btw wheres makki

iM tHe OlDeSt: ur mom

ointment bearer: I can and will murder your entire family

aloe carrier: Wait, no. Doesn’t he have a little sister?

anxious angel: and a mom who has made extra lunch for you guys???

ointment bearer: Fine

ointment bearer: But you are dead

dino boy: And you are next

ointment bearer: What are you going to do?

dino boy: Why would I tell you?

dino boy: I don’t want you to expect anything.

anxious angel: so you want him to have low expectations?

dino boy: Both of you should just wait and see

anxious angel: both?!?! what did i do???

shittykawa: i wanna guess what year you guys are in

Iwaizumi: This isn’t a game show dumbass

Matsukawa Issei: if it was, i wanna be the host who releases hell on the contestants

shittykawa: u can be the host if you tell me where makki is

Maktsukawa Issei: bitch i know iwa is tryna kill me and i wont let you get my man im not as dumb as you

aloe carrier: Woah there buckaroo

shittykawa: heavy breathing

shittykawa: thats gay

Iwaizumi: You are by far the gayest person i have met

anxious angel: gorls

aloe carrier: bois

iM tHe OlDeSt: bois and gorls

ointment bearer: I am not doing this

iM tHe OlDeSt: no do it

ointment bearer: No

dino boy: aloe carrier

iM tHe OlDeSt: u think ur smooth huh??? No u arent

dino boy: At least I can type

iM tHe OlDeSt: what do u think im doin

dino boy: Slaughtering our language one text at a time

shittykawa: first guess

shittykawa: myagi school

aloe carrier: Sure

dino boy: I don’t mind

iM tHe OlDeSt: it doesnt sound that bad

ointment bearer: Better than nothing i guess

anxious angel: not too bad

Iwaizumi: It’s not third years

Matsukawa Issei: Makki said he gets second year vibes

anxious angel: how can you see my vibes???

iM tHe OlDeSt: r u watching us???

dino boy: If you are, please tell me you have plans to kill us

ointment bearer: No I want to play volleyball still

aloe carrier: I’m conflicted

dino boy: No you aren’t, you get to live

shittykawa: no homo tho right?

Iwaizumi: You have no place saying no homo

shittykawa: yea neither do you

Iwaizumi: I didn’t even say that, are you blind?

shittykawa: hold on

shittykawa: takes off glasses

shittykawa: yes

dino boy: I don’t care what you do, don’t tell me when you gasp, heavy breath, or take off your glasses

aloe carrier: Hey, I mean this in the nicest way possible because I know you’re smart and salty and think through things

aloe carrier: But that sounds so bad out of context

dino boy: Shut up

Matsukawa Issei: no let the man speak

shittykawa: do u guys have a mascot or smth?

iM tHe OlDeSt: only the coolest awesomest flying mascot out there

ointment bearer: Shut the hell up

anxious angel: i mean, we started this for a specific outcome, right?

Iwaizumi: That much egotistical pride in a bird? Has to be Shiratorizawa.

dino boy: Good one

aloe carrier: Good one

iM tHe OlDeSt: Good one

ointment bearer: Good one

anxious angel: Good one

shittykawa: Good one

Matsukawa Issei: Good one

Matsukawa Issei: Makki said:

Matsukawa Issei: Good one

Iwaizumi: Can all of you shut up? My phone won’t stop buzzing

Iwaizumi: If not Shiratorizawa, then it’s probably the Karasuno first years

shittykawa: wait dont tell me if hes right or not bc i wanna guess whos who

shittykawa: iM tHe OlDeSt has to be shrimpy bc he said awesomest

shittykawa: dino boy types in perfect grammar and is sarcastic so he has to be that bean pole

shittykawa: since anxious angel is a girl she has to be that first year manager

shittykawa: which leaves aloe carrier and ointment bearer to be the good server or tobio-chan

shittykawa: and ointment bearer threatened to kill people all too much for him not to be tobio-chan

**ointment bearer removed shittykawa from the chat**

iM tHe OlDeSt: wait im on it

**Previous messages are no longer visible**

Iwaizumi: I can’t believe he got it right

aloe carrier: I can’t believe I’m the only one who got a compliment

dino boy: Yachi’s was indifferent, but I would count it as a compliment considering everything else

anxious angel: okay, i accept it then

iM tHe OlDeSt: no i dont im cool too

anxious angel: you are!!

ointment bearer: No you arent youre just good at running and jumping and sometimes spiking

iM tHe OlDeSt: thats nice i will take it

ointment bearer: No it wasnt shut up

Iwaizumi: I’m leaving

**Iwaizumi has left the chat**

aloe carrier: Oh no! You scared him!

dino boy: No he didn’t, he’s just a pussy

Matsukawa Issei: Fuck you

anxious angel: i can’t believe tsukishima said pussy

dino boy: In the context of being a coward, but if calling him female genitals is also rude then, in an entirely non-sexist way, you are a pussy

iM tHe OlDeSt: no u

ointment bearer: Why are you defending seijoh?

iM tHe OlDeSt: im not!!! im making fun of stingyshima

Matsukawa Issei: I swear to god I wIbdL

dino boy: Sounds fun

aloe carrier: Lol good one, Tsukki

Matsukawa Issei: hey tobio-chan i can and will tell sawamura-kun about this

aloe carrier: Whatever, snitch

iM tHe OlDeSt: yamaguchi i love you

dino boy: Shut up, shorty

ointment bearer: Dont tell him 

Matsukawa Issei: i wont if you do the thing you did when you wanted something last time

anxious angel: oddly vague 

Matsukawa Issei: he literally begged

dino boy: Send the picture

Matsukawa Issei: *image*

iM tHe OlDeSt: why is it blurry

ointment bearer: Delete that

Matsukawa Issei: do you hear that?? it sounds like a hater whos not gonna be able to play volleyball for a bit

aloe carrier: No, wait, we’ll all get in trouble

iM tHe OlDeSt: you asked him for the stuff right?

dino boy: Just tell him it was the king

ointment bearer: Tell him it was tsukishima

iM tHe OlDeSt: yea tell him it was stupidshima

anxious angel: i don’t want to sound mean but

anxious angel: blame it on tanaka-san or nishinoya-san

aloe carrier: That is kind of mean, but I’ll do that

Matsukawa Issei: good luck lol i already told him and he left the chat as soon as i did

iM tHe OlDeSt: well i have to go sleep bye

ointment bearer: My sister needs me to help her with something bye

aloe carrier: I have to go practice with Shimada-senpai, bye

dino boy: I’m going

anxious angel: my mom needs me to make dinner

Matsukawa Issei: And I’m the coward?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment, I live on the words and opinions of others. Literally say anything, I will probably reply.


	3. ugh, aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Captain oh captain: There will be a punishment
> 
> rolling THUNDAA: go off
> 
> scaredy crow: What happened?
> 
> suga ooga booga: please don’t tell me property damage is involved in any of this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, chapter three is also very long, which I didn't realize until I saw the 3,000+ words. Anyways, thanks to everyone who commented and a special thanks to Google Docs for crashing while trying to load all 72 pages of this chatfic :)

**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

Captain oh captain: Hinata, Kageyama, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi and Yachi

Captain oh captain: @sunshine child, @bakeyama, @saltyshima, @freckles-kun uwu, and @child of god

Captain oh captain: I want you all in the gym on time

Captain oh captain: You know you could’ve just told me the truth, Yamaguchi, I wouldn’t have been as disappointed as I am now

Captain oh captain: While well deserved, it was immature and gives Karasuno’s future players a bad rep

Captain oh captain: I will continue this discussion when I see you five

Captain oh captain: There will be a punishment

rolling THUNDAA: go off

scaredy crow: What happened?

suga ooga booga: please don’t tell me property damage is involved in any of this

freckles-kun uwu: Does it count if it’s my heart

suga ooga booga: stop it, i might pity you

suga ooga booga: what’d they do?

Captain oh captain: Yamaguchi asked me for the contact info for Seijoh’s third years to help him practice, but actually added all four third years to chat with all of the Karasuno first years

notice me kiyoko-san: that sounds EPIC!!! YUU LETS DO THAT!!

rolling THUNDAA: YEAAAHH

im not ur 2nd mom: You need all the second years for that. Three out of five of us don’t agree

notice me kiyoko-san: i can just get my city boi to join me

Captain oh captain: The worst part is that Kuroo would probably let his second years mess with other schools

suga ooga booga: say no more, i can hire yaku to stop them

stingyshima: I can’t believe that fool actually told on us

stingyshima: We need to have a practice game with them soon

Captain oh captain: I am not letting us do any practice games when you suggest them

freckles-kun uwu: But what if he genuinely wanted to practice and improve his skills? What if he wanted to join an official volleyball team and you denying him practice destroys his dreams?

Captain oh captain: I know what you’re doing, you manipulative first year

suga ooga booga: he isn’t manipulative, he's just painted that way :)

rolling THUNDAA: ive never even heard tadashi curse does he even kno how

stingyshima: bet

freckles-kun uwu: fuck bitches get money

rolling THUNDAA: this goes against everything i know

stingyshima: You don’t know a lot, so I doubt it’s very groundbreaking

notice me kiyoko-san: im gonna break ur fingers 

stingyshima: I don’t think you know enough about anatomy to figure out where my fingers are

freckles-kun uwu: Nice one, Tsukki!

scaredy crow: Are we not going to mention how Hinata and Kageyama strangely haven’t been active on the chat? They usually bicker on here a lot.

Captain oh captain: Good find, Asahi. I can find them, I know where Hinata lives

suga ooga booga: doesn’t he live up a mountain or something? he’s like 45 minutes away, you can’t cover that

freckles-kun uwu: He’s probably on his way now since he lives so far. That doesn’t explain how you’ll find Kageyama, though.

Captain oh captain: Hinata and Kageyama in trouble= Hinata taking a longer time to come= Kageyama waiting for Hinata= Both of them hiding near the club room fifteen minutes before practice

freckles-kun uwu: You could’ve just made a gaydar joke instead of working all the equations

stingyshima: If he had a gaydar, the thing wouldn’t shut up. I’m pretty sure no one here is actually, entirely straight

suga ooga booga: i was gonna say something but i remember my name is a pair with daichi’s

notice me kiyoko-san: i was gonna say smth but i rlly cant

rolling THUNDAA: no yea thats accurate

scaredy crow: I think that beautiful guys who are kinda gay or very gay are just attracted to volleyball

Captain oh captain: The same thing goes to girls’ volleyball

freckles-kun uwu: Girls’ volleyball is scary. You think that maybe it’ll be the same as our games, but the middle school team at my old school cursed so much in the middle of games and the amount of injuries sustained was scary.

suga ooga booga: not just volleyball, too. have you seen girls’ basketball?

scaredy crow: Please, don’t remind me

stingyshima: There’s a story there

rolling THUNDAA: good eye

notice me kiyoko-san: my sister almost joined a sport but quit last minute because she didnt think they could handle her

scaredy crow: she… she isn’t wrong

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

iM tHe OlDeSt: we should totally prank our third or second years

dino boy: It’s like you want to be killed in your first year

aloe carrier: I mean… we aren’t representing Karasuno if we’re talking to Karasuno

ointment bearer: Im not doing this again

anxious angel: ah shit here we go again

iM tHe OlDeSt: so….. r we gonna do it???

dino boy: Ugh

dino boy: Fine

aloe carrier: You don’t have to do it, Tsukki

dino boy: Did you not want me to?

iM tHe OlDeSt: uh uh someones in trouble

ointment bearer: Istg if you do a winky face i will destroy your life one family member at a time

iM tHe OlDeSt: chill

iM tHe OlDeSt: yachi do a winky face

anxious angel: sure!

anxious angel: ;)

ointment bearer: Dont think this was just restricted to hinata

iM tHe OlDeSt: ur gonna kill yachis family??? u r a psychopath

dino boy: I doubt you even know what that word means

dino boy: And, if you really want to risk getting in trouble again, I’ll do it

aloe carrier: I think you secretly like trolling your senpais

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

aloe carrier: Sorry, Tsukki

ointment bearer: We could just add the third years to this chat and disable previous messages like we did last time

anxious angel: that’s true, everything we’ve changed makes us practically untraceable, save for the small references, like hinata’s user giving away his age and tsukishima’s giving away his gender and likes

aloe carrier: I doubt they’ll realize who kageyama and i are with our usernames

dino boy: Mine is out of character, they wouldn’t think I would have this username.

iM tHe OlDeSt: ppl usually think im the youngest anyways, so they probably wont even know

anxious angel: do you guys want to do it now?? 

anxious angel: you should wait until dachi is less angry

ointment bearer: Yeah lets do that

***

  
  


iM tHe OlDeSt: i dont think hes gonna stop being angry

dino boy: I don’t think he’s angry, more annoyed

aloe carrier: I never thought that parental disappointment would hurt so much :(

ointment bearer: I cant believe we were benched the entire time

anxious angel: suga-san seemed conflicted about being the setter today, like he felt bad for us

iM tHe OlDeSt: the second years were also like that

dino boy: They didn’t feel bad, they just felt awkward because you two idiots wouldn’t stop groaning and bickering, then getting in trouble for being “a distraction”

iM tHe OlDeSt: u say that like u didnt want to play

dino boy: Yeah, but I didn’t whine like a toddler because I didn’t get my way

ointment bearer: Yeah but you sound like teenager going thru a rebellious phase

aloe carrier: You look like a teenager going through a rebellious phase, Kageyama

iM tHe OlDeSt: pffft

anxious angel: you guys need to calm down before you get into trouble for arguing

anxious angel: i don’t want to have to call tanaka-san to tear you all apart again

iM tHe OlDeSt: that was one (1) time

ointment bearer: And it wasnt my fault

dino boy: Knowing you two, it was probably about something trivial like ‘Who can finish their bath faster’

iM tHe OlDeSt: nuh uh when we did that one i won fair and square

iM tHe OlDeSt: kenma was there as a victim

aloe carrier: You do mean witness, right?

aloe carrier: It’s been three minutes, you mean witness, right???

iM tHe OlDeSt: i needed to find out the difference

iM tHe OlDeSt: i meant victim

aloe carrier: ...oh

dino boy: Your idiocy never ceases to amaze me

iM tHe OlDeSt: jokes on you knucklehead i dont even know what that means

anxious angel: which part?

ointment bearer: DUMBASS!

ointment bearer: Tsukishima explained it to us before it means the same thing as idiot

aloe carrier: I don’t know which part to react to: Hinata not knowing what idiocy means or the fact that Tsukki sat them down to explain what idiocy means

dino boy: I only did it because they were being trash talked by other teams and made me look like one of their kind

iM tHe OlDeSt: admit it u love and care for us

ointment bearer: I dont want his love

iM tHe OlDeSt: yea i dont want it either but its fun to see him weak

anxious angel: you guys are the reason why i stay at home

aloe carrier: Their existence makes me feel better since I have low self-esteem and never thought of myself as smarter than anyone to this extreme level before

iM tHe OlDeSt: i thought u were the nice one :(

aloe carrier: I am, but I’m sad and tired right now

aloe carrier: It’s tiring being me

dino boy: You’re acting like you never had a choice, you literally stand by me, I don’t think kindness is expected by you

ointment bearer: Youre calling yourself a jerk I can finally rest in peace knowing youre self aware

dino boy: I sadly can’t rest in peace knowing you type like that

iM tHe OlDeSt: no way its spicy and flavourful u english teacher

dino boy: Is that supposed to be mean? That just means I managed to make it to college, which I’m afraid will be challenging for you

iM tHe OlDeSt: fuckin fite me you blind blond stick

anxious angel: no, please don’t do that

aloe carrier: You guys need to take a chill pill

aloe carrier: It’s called a dose of melatonin, should shut you both right up so that we can all happily go on with our lives

ointment bearer: I agree

anxious angel: please do that

dino boy: I don’t need melatonin, the energy it takes to handle Hinata and Kageyama alone leaves me empty by the time I get home

iM tHe OlDeSt: u kno what lets just start the trolling now

dino boy: Fine

ointment bearer: Ok

anxious angel: i’m ready!

aloe carrier: Ok, let’s start

**Previous messages are no longer visible**

**aloe carrier added Dachi Sawamura, Sugawara Koushi, and Asahi Azumane to the chat**

Daichi Sawamura: If this is Bokuto and Kuroo again, I will go to Tokyo myself and shave your heads

iM tHe OlDeSt: well ok

aloe carrier: Thankfully we’re not…. Those people

anxious angel: it would be neat though!

Sugawara Koushi: if this is oikawa pulling another stunt, i will destroy your other knee

dino boy: You guys need to calm the fuck down and stop threatening people who aren’t here

Asahi Azumane: Wouldn’t they say they weren’t here so that they wouldn’t have to deal with getting their heads shaved and knees broken by two of the most scary people in Japan?

ointment bearer: Who knows we could be the captains

aloe carrier: It would be funny if we were the vice captains and were just watching the captains being threatened

iM tHe OlDeSt: if were doing vice captains i call akaashi

dino boy: You call Akaashi because you’re his favorite and you know it

aloe carrier: Can I be Sugawara-san?

dino boy: Then I get to be Iwaizumi

ointment bearer: No Im Iwaizumi bc Iwaizumi actually likes me

anxious angel: i don’t think i want to be a vice captain

iM tHe OlDeSt: did u wanna be a captain??

Daichi Sawamura: No one is going to be a vice captain or a captain

Asahi Azumane: ….But what about you and Suga?

Daichi Sawamura: No one is going to be a vice captain or captain besides me and Suga

dino boy: Wow, true love

aloe carrier: But I thought we had to be captain or vice captain one day…

iM tHe OlDeSt: me too i rlly wanted to be captain!!!!

ointment bearer: I dont think youd be captain 

anxious angel: i can’t imagine anyone of us being older than we currently are

Sugawara Koushi: are we gonna act like we don’t know it’s the first years still or???

dino boy: What did I say?

iM tHe OlDeSt: shut the fuck up

aloe carrier: I honestly think you should’ve taken the melatonin I expertly prescribed. None of this would have happened.

ointment bearer: You cant blame it on us if you two wanted to do it too

anxious angel: let’s all take the blame together

iM tHe OlDeSt: fine but i get the least amount 

iM tHe OlDeSt: i only get a third of it

anxious angel: there’s five of us, we all get a fifth

iM tHe OlDeSt: wait a sec

dino boy: It’s been longer than “a sec”, which part is troubling for you to get through that basketball you call a head?

iM tHe OlDeSt: im ignoring you

iM tHe OlDeSt: i only get a tenth of the blame

ointment bearer: I also only get a tenth

aloe carrier: I’ll take five tenths since I technically started this

dino boy: I will only take one twentieth and Yamaguchi revokes his five tenths in favor of three tenths

aloe carrier: Just because you said that

aloe carrier: I now take six tenths

anxious angel: hold on!!! I need to find out how much is left for me

dino boy: No you don’t, Yamaguchi, you, and me can take zero blame and Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber can each take a half

ointment bearer: I hate you with a burning passion

dino boy: Tweedle Dumber just earned seven tenths of the blame

iM tHe OlDeSt: hah! im tweedle dumb

Sugawara Koushi: guys stop we cant stop laughing oh my god

Sugawara Koushi: you all need to chill out, no one is getting blamed

iM tHe OlDeSt: really?

Daichi Sawamura: Really?

Asahi Azumane: Really?

Sugawara Koushi: yeah, i mean no harm was done and we did similar stuff when we were first and second years

Sugawara Koushi: we still do that kind of stuff anyways

anxious angel: thanks suga-san!

aloe carrier: thanks suga-san!

iM tHe OlDeSt: thanks suga-san!

dino boy: I’ll do it, stop spamming me 

dino boy: thanks suga-san.

ointment bearer: Why do you feel the need to be annoying everywhere you go

ointment bearer: stop spamming me dumbass!!

ointment bearer: thanks suga-san

Sugawara Koushi: good, now you five (yes, even yachi) need to do an extra warm up. i can’t believe the disrespect

Sugawara Koushi: you could’ve done anyone and you chose us?? your legal guardians???

Daichi Sawamura: I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree

Sugawara Koushi: i can’t believe you’re insinuating that we aren’t married and have children

Asahi Azumane: Who am I?

Sugawara Koushi: it depends. sometimes you’re like an aunt or uncle, sometimes you’re like a cousin, and sometimes you’re like a child

Asahi Azumane: I take offense to that

Sugawara Koushi: good, we can’t have our wimpy ace thinking he can just be praised all the time

Asahi Azumane: I’m already down, Suga!

Daichi Sawamura: You’re strong, you can take more punches

aloe carrier: Us: oh, let’s prank the third years from our school!  
The third years from our school: ahaha asahi’s a fukkin wimp and yall r in trouble lol

anxious angel: accurate

dino boy: You forgot the part where you all briefly got into an argument about fractions

iM tHe OlDeSt: it wasnt about fractions!!!!

ointment bearer: I dont want to talk about it

Daichi Sawamura: We’re going to remove ourselves from this chat

Daichi Sawamura: Bye guys!

Sugawara Koushi: bye you guys!

Asahi Azumane: Bye, see you later!

iM tHe OlDeSt: WAIT!!

iM tHe OlDeSt: we didnt give you guys nicknames yet

dino boy: Oh my god

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed Daichi Sawamura to ‘can & will shave kuroo & bokuto’**

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed Asahi Azumane to ‘punch him more’**

**iM tHe OlDeSt renamed Sugawara Koushi to ‘thanks suga-san’**

punch him more: I would take offense to my name, but it’s a quote I’ll hold everyone to in the future

thanks suga-san: what, are you gonna force me to punch you and kill you when you’re an elderly old man and have me arrested for assault and murder?

punch him more: Obviously

can & will shave kuroo & bokuto: I don’t like that mine doesn’t specify what I’ll be shaving

iM tHe OlDeSt: theres a limit to letters ok!!

dino boy: I never talk to Kuroo, but I will send him your username

iM tHe OlDeSt: why dont u talk to kuroo?? i talk to bokuto-san all the time!! if i had to be a captain id wanna be him!!

dino boy: Again, you’d only do that because he favors you and you are aware of that

iM tHe OlDeSt: hey dont be jealous that one of the coolest aces and one of the coolest setters loves me 

thanks suga-san: wow fuck me i guess

punch him more: I never out right said you’re my favorite, Hinata, but that doesn’t mean I don’t respect you at all

iM tHe OlDeSt: its not supposed to be offensive to u guys!!! i just kinda like that the coolest captain and vice captain are my mentors

can & will shave kuroo & bokuto: I am leaving

thanks suga-san: i’m also leaving

iM tHe OlDeSt: I MEANT FROM TOKYO NOT OVERALL I SWEAR ON NATSU!!!

can & will shave kuroo & bokuto: You’re lucky I trust you sometimes, Hinata. Love you guys, I need to get going now

**can & will shave kuroo & bokuto left the chat**

**thanks suga-san left the chat**

**punch him more left the chat**

dino boy: You do know that you’re a serial liar, right?

iM tHe OlDeSt: i have 2 sets of parents what am i supposed to do!!!!

ointment bearer: I cant believe you did that

aloe carrier: I can’t believe you have an obvious favorite set of parents

iM tHe OlDeSt: no i love both of my parent sets i just love my owl parents a bit more

anxious angel: it’s ok, hinata! i was kinda adopted by kiyoko in a way where we’re dating but she acts motherly sometimes.

aloe carrier: I mean, I guess I would say Shimada-san is more of my preferred father figure

aloe carrier: And even though Tsukki won’t say it, Kuroo is his volleyball dad

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

aloe carrier: Sorry, Tsukki

ointment bearer: I guess Iwaizumi-san was like my team dad even though Oikawa hated me

iM tHe OlDeSt: i cant believe we all have other parents different from daichi-san and sugawara-san

dino boy: You do realize you have an actual mother who birthed you and your sibling, right?

anxious angel: shhh don’t remind me

aloe carrier: Shimada-san is so cool, though!

iM tHe OlDeSt: bokuto-san and akaashi-san know i’m their son

ointment bearer: Theyre owls and youre a crow

iM tHe OlDeSt: yeah well whats seijohs mascot? 

anxious angel: you guys…. we’re not furries, we’re school children

dino boy: The fact that you had to make sure everyone was aware that no one is actually a crow and that their “parents” aren’t actually owls or whatever the hell Seijoh is is mind blowing, but still expected

aloe carrier: You guys, we’re getting way too serious about who our volleyball parents/mentors are

iM tHe OlDeSt: we should add bokuto-san, akaashi-san, kuroo-san, kiyoko-san, shimada-san, iwaizumi-san, and oikawa-san all on the chat!!! 

ointment bearer: I already hate the idea but if we do it then no Oikawa

dino boy: We’re not doing it, but if we did, then no Kuroo and definitely Oikawa

aloe carrier: Shimada-san has a job and stuff, I don’t think he’d even find out about being added to a chat until the hype of everyone being on it is over

anxious angel: kiyoko-san sometimes gets shy when so many people are expecting her to reply and stuff, i don’t know if it would work….

iM tHe OlDeSt: we can like ask their permission and get our original parents on the chat too!!

dino boy: You want a playdate where our “parents” meet? You really are a dumbass.

dino boy: We just escaped barely scathed by the Seijoh incident and I’m pretty sure what you did to our upperclassmen will forever weigh you down

dino boy: If we’re pulling another stunt that includes adding anyone other than the Karasuno first years in a group chat, we are waiting weeks, because I am not tarnishing my reputation and getting in trouble more than I have to because you idiots can’t be mature for two days in a row at least.

iM tHe OlDeSt: fine but its happening one day

dino boy: Have fun with that

  
  



	4. yes, stuck in a window

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> aloe carrier: You know how I was hanging out with Hinata today, which also meant I was hanging out with Kageyama?
> 
> dino boy: I was aware, yes.
> 
> anxious angel: okay?
> 
> aloe carrier: And you know how they like to stay late at the gym? And how the gym has windows?
> 
> dino boy: Please tell me you’re not going in the direction I think you’re going.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, another update. This one is shorter than the other three, but I hope you guys still like it! It was hard to transition into actual writing, sorry if it sucks a lot!  
> Oh, and thanks to everyone who commented, bookmarked, subscribed, etc. I go back and read comments and make sure to reply to them, they're all really nice!

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

  
  


aloe carrier: Hey?

aloe carrier: Tsukki, Yachi?

anxious angel: yeah?

dino boy: What?

aloe carrier: You know how I was hanging out with Hinata today, which also meant I was hanging out with Kageyama?

dino boy: I was aware, yes.

anxious angel: okay?

aloe carrier: And you know how they like to stay late at the gym? And how the gym has windows?

dino boy: Please tell me you’re not going in the direction I think you’re going.

aloe carrier: So, the windows were opened because why not, y’know? And a ball managed to fly out of one, so Hinata decided to climb and jump and stuff because he’s Hinata

aloe carrier: And I was fine, just making fun of him from a distance and doing receives and tosses with Kageyama

aloe carrier: But then he decided to yell “I bet I can get the volleyball faster than you!”

aloe carrier: So Kageyama decided to run out of the gym to get the volleyball so I obviously started to make fun of him too

aloe carrier: Then Hinata said “I meant through the window! Going out the door is cheating!”

dino boy: Just get on with it, I cannot handle this anymore

anxious angel: i’m just scared by the build up

aloe carrier: So, somehow, Kageyama also climbed up there and he kinda just jumped right in with such vigor and intensity that the window just shut on them

aloe carrier: And the windows are so very old and creaky

aloe carrier: And Hinata and Kageyama are two teenagers who do sports

aloe carrier: And while I am also that, I am very weak and need help to remove them before Coach Ukai hears them from his store and finds us

aloe carrier: Can one of you or both of you come?

dino boy: As much as I hate them, I don’t want you to get into trouble

dino boy: I’ll be there in 10 minutes

anxious angel: i’m also kind of weak, but i can join for moral support!

anxious angel: i was out buying a snack, so i can be there in about 5 mins

aloe carrier: Thank you guys!

  
  
  
  


**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

im not ur 2nd mom: I know the third years are out, so does anyone else want to explain to me why, when I went back to the gym because I forgot my jacket, I heard screaming and saw what looked like heads poking out of the window?

notice me kiyoko-san: ennoshita i didnt kno u were such a fuckin snitch

ROLLING THUNDAA: snitchs get stitchs

im not ur 2nd mom: Is anyone other than Tanaka and Nishinoya on?

im not ur 2nd mom: Going once

im not ur 2nd mom: Going twice

im not ur 2nd mom: Fine, do you two know what’s going on?

notice me kiyoko-san: i dont think i wanna talk to u anymroe since u obvs dont wanna talk to me

ROLLING THUNDAA: i thought we were ur fave second years…

notice me kiyoko-san: am i not ur fave wing spiker???

ROLLING THUNDAA: have u met a better libero than me?????

im not ur 2nd mom: Seriously, do you two know what’s going on?

freckles-kun uwu: What’s going on?

im not ur 2nd mom: Yamaguchi, thank god

im not ur 2nd mom: What’s going on at the gym?

freckles-kun uwu: I think Hinata said that Kageyama and him were going to practice

freckles-kun uwu: Yachi was also going to be there to help with the balls and to make sure they don’t get into another fight

im not ur 2nd mom: Oh, ok

im not ur 2nd mom: If Yachi is there, then I guess it’s all good

freckles-kun uwu: Yeah, it should be fine

im not ur 2nd mom: Just make sure you get in touch with Yachi and make sure everything is alright

ROLLING THUNDAA: i cant believe the DISRESPECT

freckles-kun uwu: Will do, mom

im not ur 2nd mom: -_-

notice me kiyoko-san: fine whatevs ill just go fuck myself ig jeez ennoshita

###

“I can’t believe I just lied to Ennoshita,” Yamaguchi muttered as he put his phone aside to help his friend in pulling Kageyama and Hinata out from the window, a predicament he still couldn’t wrap his head around.

“I can’t believe he believed you, that was a horrible lie,” Tsukishima said, giving Kageyama a strong tug, smirking as the black-haired boy let out a yelp, followed by a misplaced kick.

Yamaguchi used his entire body weight to move the window in any way possible before stopping and catching his breath and balance, trying not to be knocked over by the small, wiggling form furiously kicking from the window.

“C’mon guys, you can do it!” Yachi yelled from her place in the gym, hands cupped around her mouth.

“Why don’t you just break the window?” Kageyama growled, flexing his back while Tsukishima pushed the window in a sorry attempt to free himself out.

“No! If we break the window then-” Hinata let a frustrated groan as he tried to push himself out with his arms as leverage, “-everyone will know that we got stuck in the window!”

Yamaguchi then broke into laughter, letting go of the window and clinging onto whatever he had as he tried to regain oxygen. When he actually stopped focusing on everything wrong going on, he could start to notice just how dumb the situation truly was. 

In a single window, two of the most feared first year volleyball players from his school were stuck, with their butts and legs wiggling and moving wildly. He could only imagine how everything looked on the outside, two crazy teenagers screaming and pushing their arms against the wall.

This caused Tsukishima to stop pushing the window and let out a small chuckle, grinning along with Yamaguchi.

“You guys are so mean!” Hinata screamed, kicking in Yamaguchi’s direction.

###

  
  


**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

Captain oh captain: Excuse me, what happened last night?

freckles-kun uwu: idk Yachi, Hinata, or Kageyama would know

  
  
  
  


**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

iM tHe OlDeSt: fr yamaguchi???

anxious angel: i thought we were friends!

ointment bearer: I am NOT dealing with this

  
  


**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

child of god: yeah, i was there with hinata and kageyama

child of god: they just got a bit frustrated, i think

Captain oh captain: Hmm

Captain oh captain: Okay, but don’t let them stay that late again

child of god: definitely not, sir

Captain oh captain: You too, Yamaguchi

freckles-kun kun uwu: What’d I do???

Captain oh captain: Next time something like this happens, you have to go too. I trust you and Yachi a lot more than I trust Kageyama and Hinata

freckles-kun uwu: What about Tsukki?

Captain oh captain: I would trust him more, but when he’s with Hinata, Kageyama, Tanaka, or Nishinoya, he just encourages them too much. It’s even more dangerous than usual.

freckles-kun uwu: I mean…. if I have to stay later, he’ll also probably come with

child of god: it’s fine! i’m sure we can get along fine, since we’re all in the same year and have an appreciation for volleyball, at the very least

Captain oh captain: Great!

Captain oh captain: Yamaguchi, Tsukishima, Hinata, and Kageyama better hope to get along, otherwise “an appreciation for volleyball” is all you guys will have!

Captain oh captain: :D

freckles-kun uwu: oh

freckles-kun uwu: Fun convo, I gotta go and lie awake under my blankets again, bye bye.

child of god: can i come too?

freckles-kun uwu: Sure! Tsukki will also be there.

child of god: can i invite hinata and kageyama? 

freckles-kun uwu: Sure!

freckles-kun uwu: You’re usually not allowed to sleepover, right?

child of god: yeah, since there’s no other girls

freckles-kun uwu: It’s ok! We’re all very gay!

Captain oh captain: Lol I’m glad you’re getting along

Captain oh captain: Please, don’t get any noise complaints or drag me, Suga, or Asahi into this

Captain oh captain: Or Kiyoko

Captain oh captain: Have fun!

freckles-kun uwu: Ok, daichi-san! Love you!

Captain oh captain: ….

Captain oh captain: Love you too

  
  
  


**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

  
  


iM tHe OlDeSt: ooh a sleepover???

ointment bearer: I guess I can come

dino boy: I have to be there, don’t I?

aloe carrier: Yup!

anxious angel: is it actually now? because i can come now, as long as i get back in time to make dinner, since tomorrow’s not a school night

iM tHe OlDeSt: breaking news: i cant come bc i need to watch my sister since my moms working a bit late

ointment bearer: oh

aloe carrier: Kageyama! You can still come even if Hinata isn’t coming! We’re all friends!

ointment bearer: We… are?

aloe carrier: Unless you didn’t want to be friends?

ointment bearer: No I just never really had friends like this in a while

aloe carrier: People don’t make group chats, prank elders, and pull others out of windows and just stay strangers!

dino boy: I hope you live by that

anxious angel: wow! i just realized how close we’ve become!

iM tHe OlDeSt: we need to do another sleepover when im open!!!

aloe carrier: Sure!

dino boy: I can’t believe I’m in a friend group with the two dumbest people on the planet….

iM tHe OlDeSt: its ok! ive heard denial is the first step!

ointment bearer: Dumbass! That’s about people dying!

iM tHe OlDeSt: oh

iM tHe OlDeSt: can u prove we arent dead?????

iM tHe OlDeSt: huh?!?!?

dino boy: Seriously, the dumbest people on the planet

anxious angel: lol i’m happy with this friendship! we’ll be the greatest, especially when we all get into our third year!

aloe carrier: Let’s leave all that heavy stuff for another spontaneous sleepover

aloe carrier: Tsukki is already here, you two coming soon?

anxious angel: oof i might take 15-20 mins

ointment bearer: Ill probably be there in ten mins

aloe carrier: It’s all good! We’ll be waiting!

iM tHe OlDeSt: u guys better have fun but not too much bc i wanna be there when it gets cool

dino boy: Just because you said that, I’ll make sure that we have the most fun ever

ointment bearer: Sure

aloe carrier: Just because you said that, I’ll make sure we go to bed at 9:00 PM sharp and wake up at 7:30 AM

aloe carrier: No late night shenanigans in my house

anxious angel: works for me! i’ll be gone a little before that anyways!

ointment bearer: Fine dont do any of that ill behave or whatever

aloe carrier: Great :)

iM tHe OlDeSt: ok well bye for now 

ointment bearer: Bye hinata

anxious angel: bye hinata!

aloe carrier: See you later, Hinata!

dino boy: Bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is being edited and might take longer to come out. It'll be an actual story and is kind of long. I don't know if you guys would prefer the sleepover to be split up in parts or if you want it all at once, so please tell me! Hinata will not be because I cannot write more than three people, which I manage to fail at still, so I apologize.


	5. sleepover time~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Can we search it up?” Kageyama asked, gesturing to the forgotten laptop.
> 
> “You want to research how to have fun and bond at a sleepover?” Tsukishima asked incredulously.
> 
> “I think it should be fine, right?” Yamaguchi shrugged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, ok, I meant for this to be out a bit earlier than this but my already non-existent mental health just LEFT in the middle of everything and I just stood around reflecting on how sad I am like that emo tall boy from the Miyai training camp did. This is also super dialogue heavy with 0.001% of description because any writing skill I had joined my mental health. Anyways, enjoy this chapter that managed to get up to 4,000+ words.

Yamaguchi opened the door for Kageyama and stepped aside to let the setter enter.

“Hey, Kageyama! Did you want something to eat or drink? Maybe milk?” Yamaguchi offered as he led the other boy through a hallway and turned into a room with blankets and pillows strewn on the ground with Tsukishima underneath a portion of the mountain, a laptop sitting in front of him.

“No, I’m good for now,” Kageyama replied, letting Yamaguchi take his spot next to his best friend before settling next to Yamaguchi, awkwardly sitting straight. “What are we doing?”

“We were watching a documentary, but you probably wouldn’t understand it,” Tsukishima answered, a small smirk on his face.

Yamaguchi snickered and lightly pushed the taller boy before saying, “Tsukki! Don’t be so mean, especially after he came all the way over here!”

“What do you mean? I just said that we’re already halfway through it.” Tsukishima blinked, feigning innocence.

“You better watch out, unless you want a jump serve to the neck,” Kageyama growled.

“Fine by me. You’d just get kicked out for purposely injuring a teammate.”

“Okay!” Yamaguchi exclaimed, “Let’s just calm down and watch something. Or did you guys want to play anything?”

“I’m fine with watching something, unless it’s a volleyball game. I think the Schweiden Adlers are playing tonight,” Tsukishima said.

“Yeah, they’re playing the Tachibana Red Falcons,” Yamaguchi confirmed with a nod.

“Hey, what do you have against the Schweiden Adlers?” Kageyama asked, squinting at the blond boy.

“Nothing, I just would rather watch the MSBY Black Jackals. I think that they’re better,” Tsukishima responded, not even looking to meet the other boy’s face.

“But the Schweiden Adlers are better than the MSBY Black Jackals, idiot!”

“I never said the weren’t,” Tsukishima answered slowly, as if talking to a child, “I just appreciate the MSBY Black Jackals more. Fukurodani is better than Karasuno, do you like Fukurodani more?”

“!-” Kageyama began. “Nevermind. I guess even you get an opinion.”

“So,” Yamaguchi interjected, “let’s not do volleyball. In fact, why don’t we try to not talk about pro volleyball in general, unless it’s related to a more positive conversation?”

“Whatever,” Tsukishima turned to face the laptop screen.

“Fine,” Kageyama did the same, a scowl on his face.

“Great. Maybe we can watch-”

There was the sound of knocking, most likely from the final person meant to arrive. 

“I’ll get it, why don’t you two find something on YouTube? I know Tsukki likes to make fun of that one channel, what was it?” Yamaguchi paused before snapping his fingers. “Troom Troom!”

“I don’t care,” Kageyama muttered, typing in said channel name.

Yamaguchi left his room and opened the front door, revealing the final guest, Yachi.

“Hi, Yamaguchi-kun!” She greeted.

“Hello, Yachi!! Did you want anything to eat or drink?” Yamaguchi pushed the door closed as Yachi shook her head and followed the pinch server down a hallway to his room. “Tsukki and Kageyama are already here."

Both boys mentioned were sitting farther apart than before, both seemingly pissed off 

"What happened?" Yachi asked, tilting her head.

"I genuinely don't want to know," Yamaguchi said as he walked in and sat down on the cushion closest to Tsukishima.

Yachi followed and sat down on a smaller one in-between Kageyama and Yamaguchi.

***

The sleepover was going well. Or, as well as a sleepover with almost all the Karasuno first years can go.

Several bags of chips were in a neat pile next to the group of teens, as well as two melted ice packs, a couple of soda cans that appeared to have been crushed. The first years were huddled in a circle, with Tsukishima and Yamaguchi leaning into each other, a blanket shared between the two, Yachi sitting next to Yamaguchi, and Kageyama between Tsukishima and Yachi, leaning towards the latter of the two more, considering Tsukishima was, well,  _ him. _

“Be honest, who in the team is your favorite?” Yamaguchi asked, grinning.

“I don’t have a favorite, you’re all annoying,” Tsukishima replied. Yamaguchi’s smile became smaller at that answer, so the taller boy sighed and added, “Except for Yamaguchi.”

“Like that was a surprise,” Kageyama scoffed, “I guess I respect the upperclassmen, like Sugawara-san and Daichi-san. I don’t really have any reason to dislike Ennoshita-san, Narita-san, or Kinoshita-san. Yamaguchi and Yachi are also okay.”

“And shrimpy?” Tsukishima asked with a smirk.

“He’s a dumbass.”

“I like Kiyoko-san the most, since she’s so smart and pretty! As far as actual teammates go, I think that everyone is nice, but I usually hang out with Hinata and Yamaguchi,” Yachi answered.

“Well, I guess I don’t really hate anyone on the team or anything, but I do like Tsukki the best, since we  _ are _ dating,” Yamaguchi replied, before adding, “I also hang out with Hinata and Yachi a lot, but Kageyama and I get along well enough. Other than us first years, I think that I’m good friends with Narita-san, Kinoshita-san, and Ennoshita-san, since we’re all in the groupchat.”

“What groupchat?” Yachi asked.

“Oh, I’m in a groupchat with a lot of us players who are usually benched. It used to be just Karasuno, but we slowly expanded to the rest of Miyagi, then Tokyo, and even Inarizaki in Hyogo,” He explained.

“I’m in a chat like that, but it’s just setters. I’m also in one for everyone who went to the Japan Training Camp, like Sakusa-san and Atsumu-san,” Kageyama said.

“Me, too!,” Yachi exclaimed, “I’m in one with all the managers, which used to be Karasuno and Fukurodani only, but we added Ubugawa, Johzenji, and some other schools.” 

“Unfortunately, I’m also in multiple groupchats. I’m in one with middle blockers, one with Kuroo-san, Bokuto-san, Akaashi-san, Hinata, and Lev, and another one with a couple of the first years from the first year training camp. The worst part is that Hinata is in every single groupchat I’m in,” Tsukishima said with distaste.

“Which first years are in the training camp one?” Yachi asked.

“Hinata, Goshiki, Koganegawa, Kindaichi, and Kunimi,” Tsukishima answered. “Surprisingly, the Seijoh first years are the most tolerable.

“I think Hinata is in a chat for short people,” Kageyama said after a few seconds.

“Excuse me?” Tsukishima squinted at the raven haired boy.

“Oh, yeah! The one with Nishinoya-san, Yaku-san, and that one kid from Wakunan!” Yachi nodded excitedly. 

“There’s more, right?” Yamaguchi tilted his head. “They have more liberos and I think they added the white haired boy Kageyama went to training camp with.”

Yachi looked up in thought, “What was his name? Hori?”

“The kid from Wakunan was Takeru!” Yamaguchi exclaimed, snapping his fingers.

“The boy from the training camp is Hoshiumi,” Kageyama answered.

“They were never going to get  _ Hoshiumi _ if their guess was Hori,” Tsukishima said.

“It was close enough!” Yamaguchi squaked, lightly shoving the blond boy’s shoulder.

They continued to jump from topic to topic, until it was time for Yachi to go back home. All of the boys got up from the floor to see her off, each hugging her (awkwardly), and waving as she began her walk to the station.

“So, what do you guys want to do now?” Yamaguchi asked as they settled back on the cushions.

“I’ve never gone to a sleepover before, so I don’t really know what to do,” Kageyama confessed, avoiding eye contact.

“That’s okay!” Yamaguchi reassured, “Tsukki and I have sleepovers all the time, but I kind of wanted to do something so we can bond, like in the movies. I haven’t been to a sleepover like that before, though.”

Both boys turned to Tsukishima, who crossed his arms.

“My experience is the same as Yamaguchi’s, I don’t know why you two think I would know anything.”

“Can we search it up?” Kageyama asked, gesturing to the forgotten laptop.

“You want to research how to have fun and bond at a sleepover?” Tsukishima asked incredulously.

“I think it should be fine, right?” Yamaguchi shrugged.

The freckled boy peered over Kageyama’s shoulder as he typed in ‘what to do at sleepovers’. After a few seconds, the results loaded, a couple of links and pictures. Kageyama clicked on the first link, which led to a website with a completely pink background and the large banner reading ‘GIRL HELP! FUN ADVICE FOR GIRLS’ in purple.

“Oh.” Kageyama muttered.

“Oh?” Tsukishima repeated, raising a brow.

“Oh,” Yamaguchi said with a nod.

“It says ‘girl help’,” Kageyama said. “It also says girls only under it.”

“Okay, and?” Tsukishima asked, despite seeming a bit embarrassed.

“I mean, there shouldn’t be much difference, right? It’s not like it’s going to talk about bras or something,” Yamaguchi said.

Kageyama seemed hesitant, but scrolled through the website, forehead creased with confusion and eyes focused on the bubbly font.

“At least read it out loud, sheesh!” Tsukishima plucked the laptop from in front of him and started to read, “It says, ‘A fun game to play with your friends at a sleepover has to be Two Truths and a Lie. You’ll learn all sorts of wacky things about each other’,” He read, no emotion present 

“We can try it, right?” Yamaguchi asked. “Who wants to go first?” He was met with silence, so he sighed and began.

“Okay, I’ll start. I’ve broken two bones, I can’t handle spicy foods, or-”

“You  _ can  _ handle spicy foods, you only eat spicy food. That’s the lie,” Tsukishima interrupted.

“Hey! I wanted to guess!” Kageyama yelled, glaring at the blond boy.

“Yeah, well you weren’t fast enough, genius.”

“That’s not how the game works, asshole!”

“How would you know? You literally said that you never went to a sleepover before.”

“Guys!” Yamaguchi screamed, his hands cupped around his mouth. “Okay, let’s  _ not  _ do Two Truths and a Lie.”

Tsukishima and Kageyama glared at each other, before Tsukishima opened the laptop and began to read, again, emotionless, “‘Another fun game to play with your girls is Never Have I Ever. Everyone has ten fingers up and each person puts one down for each thing done. You can do themes to make it more interesting.’”

“What theme could we do?” Kageyama pondered aloud.

“We all play volleyball, we all live in Japan, hmm,” Yamaguchi said. “Oh! Training camp!”

“Okay,” Tsukishima agreed with a nod, putting both his hands up. The other two boys followed.

“Um, never have I ever… missed a match from make-up work?” Yamaguchi questioned.

Kageyama scowled and put a finger down.

“Never have I ever hit a captain other than Daichi-san with a ball,” Kageyama said, glancing at the other boys.

Tsukishima put a finger down immediately, muttering about Kuroo being annoying, and Yamaguchi seemed to think about it before asking, “Does it count if it hit Daichi-san then another captain?”

“Explain,” Tsukishima demanded.

“I, uh, well,” Yamaguchi blushed, “I tried serving a ball, but Nishinoya screamed or something in the middle and I panicked, so I hit it wrong and it hit Daichi-san on the shoulder before bouncing out of the gym and hitting Bokuto-san in the face.”

“Did they get hurt?” Kageyama asked.

“Daichi stumbled a bit, but I guess the ball gained something from hitting Daichi-san and since Bokuto-san wasn’t expecting it, he kinda fell into Akaashi-san. Or, when I went out to check, they were both on the ground.” Yamaguchi explained, cheeks aflame.

“How did I not know this happened?” Tsukishima said, tilting his head slightly.

“I don’t know, I guess I didn’t want anyone to know that I managed to injure our captain and the captain and vice captain of a powerhouse school.” Yamaguchi cleared his throat, “Your turn, Tsukki!”

“Never have I ever gotten slapped by a manager,” The blond said with a knowing smirk.

“You dick,” Kageyama growled as he put another finger down.

“Woah, what happened?” Yamaguchi asked.

“I went up to the Fukurodani manager, the one with all the food, and I told her I was thirsty.” 

“No, you nervously went up to the manager, looked everywhere but her face, and said you were thirsty,” Tsukishima corrected.

“Everywhere but her face?” Yamaguchi echoed.

“I wasn’t in a good mood and I had already choked on some food and had to get Akaashi-san to help me, so I went to get more water and didn’t want to look her in the face, okay! I guess she thought the wrong thing and hit me! Then the Fukurodani regulars, the libero and the blond one, laughed at me!” Kageyama confessed angrily. 

“Did you tell her you weren’t interested in her?” Yamaguchi asked.

“Obviously not, that would’ve been the smart thing to do,” Tsukishima said, the evil smirk present on his face.

“You look like Kuroo-san whenever he blocks a spike,” Kageyama commented, glaring daggers.

“How dare you, you-”

“Let’s do another game!” Yamaguchi interjected. “What’s the next one?”

Tsukishima looked down at the laptop and read, “‘A popular game to play is Truth or Dare! Getting a friend to reveal a crush or daring them to do something like a cartwheel is always fun to watch.’”

“A cartwheel?” Kageyama asked, confused.

“Revealing a crush?” Yamaguchi asked, equally confused.

“I’ll start this one,” Tsukishima said. “Truth or dare?”

“Oh! Dare!” Yamaguchi replied instantly.

“Okay,” Tsukishima thought for a moment before saying, “Confess your love to someone.”

“You-I-w-what?” Yamaguchi spluttered. “Who?”

“No one from Karasuno, since they’ll know. Nekoma and Fukurodani know us well, too. Who else is there?” Kageyama asked.

“I happen to have Kuroo’s number, so I can ask,” Tsukishima said, mischief apparent in his voice and grin.

“I thought you loved me!” Yamaguchi screeched.

“Shush,” Tsukishima said, his phone chiming instantly. “That was quicker than I thought. Okay, you have a couple of choices.”

“And we get to decide,” Kageyama added.

“Finally, you say something useful. Okay, Ushijima, Tendou, Bokuto, or someone named Daishou who goes to Nohebi, a school in Tokyo,” Tsukishima read.

“Don’t do Ushijima,” Kageyama said.

“Why?” Yamaguchi asked, voice quivering.

“I don’t know, it just doesn’t seem like a good idea.”

“I guess the king isn’t wrong, it wouldn’t be that good of an idea,” Tsukishima agreed. “Don’t do Tendou either, I don’t want you anywhere near that gremlin.”

“I don’t want to do Bokuto-san, that’s just really uncomfortable,” Yamaguchi said, “I’m pretty sure he and Akaashi-san are gonna give me weird looks next time we see them. Oh my God, imagine if they tell Hinata!”

“Okay,” Tsukishima cut off Yamaguchi’s panicked cries, “Then I guess that leaves whoever Daishou is. Since I’m so nice, I’ll use my phone to call him.”

Tsukishima entered the number as Yamaguchi took deep breaths and Kageyama awkwardly rubbed his back. Tsukishima handed Yamaguchi the phone, ringing on speaker phone. It rang two times before a voice said, “Hello? Who is this?”

Yamaguchi’s eyes widened and he frantically looked at the other two boys, who both mouthed names too quickly for Yamaguchi to read. 

“I’m Kuroo Tetsurou!” He squeaked, causing Tsukishima to face palm and for Kageyama to hang his head.

“No, you’re not,” Daishou said slowly. “Who are you? I don’t have time for this.”

“Oh, uh, sorry? I’m… Kozume Kenma?” Yamaguchi replied.

“Nekoma’s setter, right? Okay, I’ll bite. What do you want?”

Yamaguchi took a deep breath, closed his eyes and, with all the sincerity he could muster, said, “I love you.”

The call ended and Yamaguchi let out a breath while Tsukishima covered his mouth as a few bubbles of laughter escaped. Kageyama’s shoulders shook as he closed his eyes and tried to keep in his laughter.

“Okay, I’m glad we’re done with that, let’s-”

“Who says we have to be done with it now?” Tsukishima asked, eyes challenging.

“Me, before I get an anxiety attack.” Yamaguchi slid his phone under his legs, cheeks still flushed and hands shaky.

“No, you don’t need to do anything. But, I think that Kageyama can help this situation,” Tsukishima said as he put Daishou's number into Kageyama’s phone and handed it to him.

“What? No.” Kageyama crossed his arms. “I am  _ not _ telling anyone I love them.”

“You don’t tell your boys that before you go to bed?” Yamaguchi asked, feigning genuine confusion.

“What boys?” Kageyama asked, eyebrows creased in what was either disgust or ignorance.

“ _ Your  _ boys, Kageyama,” Yamaguchi replied, placing a hand over his heart.

“Sorry to interrupt whatever you two are doing,” Tsukishima said, very clearly not apologetic, “but I don’t need you to tell that guy you love him. You just need to tell him Kenma loves him.”

“I have two questions,” Kageyama said as Tsukishima mumbled something about quickening comprehension skills, “Who am I supposed to be and what’s the point?”

“Well, I’m pretty sure the point is that Tsukki loves seeing others in pain and Nekoma will surely be in pain after our suffering,” Yamaguchi answered.

“I won’t agree or disagree, but to answer your question, I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to be dead from natural selection. It’s honestly surprising you managed to make people think you’re smart,” Tsukishima replied.

Kageyama scowled and said, “I meant who am I going to tell this guy I am.”

“Come up with it in the moment, like I did,” Yamaguchi advised with a reassuring grin.

“Despite me telling you multiple names, too.”

“Tsukki! You know I’m not good at reading lips! Just because you know how doesn’t mean we all mastered the art of understanding people opening their mouths with pointed eye contact.”

“Shut up, Yamaguchi.”

“Sorry, Tsukki.”

“Fine, I’ll do it. Just stop doing that,” Kageyama said as he pressed the call button.

The call was answered immediately this time, catching the three boys off guard.

“Hello?” 

“...”

Tsukishima made angry gestures at Kageyama, who was staring at the phone with a shocked expression as Yamaguchi frantically looked between the two, about to lunge for the phone to end the call when-

“I… I am Yaku Morisuke.”

The call was silent for a few seconds before Daishou said, “What do you people want with me?”

“Kenma loves you.”

“I swear to God-”

“Kenma loves you.”

“Leave me alone!”

And the call ended.

This time Tsukishima didn’t cover up his laughter and Yamaguchi joined in, laughing even harder at Kageyama’s bewildered expression.

“What-” Yamaguchi huffed, “What was that?”

“I panicked,” Kageyama replied, eyes still blown wide and mouth opened in a small ‘o’. 

“Yeah, we could tell,” Tsukishima wheezed as he removed his glasses to wipe away tears, “I cannot believe your idiocy just made this even better than it originally was.”

“Shut up!”

**Meanwhile, in Tokyo**

Kenma sat criss crossed in bed, eyes glued to his console. He was currently at the climax of the game that he had restarted multiple times just to get all the necessary equipment and power-ups. His character was still not powerful enough, but if he just evaded at the right times and used everything moderately, he would be okay.

At that moment, his phone began to vibrate on his nightstand. He sighed and put down his PSP, picking up his phone without even checking the contact.

“Kenma!” Kuroo yelled, causing the blonde boy to flinch at the sudden noise.

“What?” He said, his voice raspy from disuse.

“You didn’t call Daishou, right?” Kuroo asked, his tone urgent.

“Obviously not. I told you to stop calling me when things happen in that cursed captain chat-”

“Daishou said that you called him, told you you loved him, and that Yaku called afterwards and told him that you love him! I thought you and Shrimpy were in a relationship!”

The last time Kenma sighed this hard, he was forced to practice with Lev.

“Kuroo, not only does that not sound like anything I’d say, or anything Yaku would say, but you’re also smart enough to know that, which is even more disappointing. Also, Shouyou and I are not in a relationship.”

“Considering the fact that you called him  _ Shouyou _ ,” Kenma could imagine his best friend’s stupid smug face, “I think that you are, you just haven’t realized it yet from your head being bent down on that PSP.”

“Are not.”

“Are too.”

“Are not.”

“Are too.”

Kenma looked down at his sheets for a moment before saying, “Are not.”

“Are too.” Kuroo wasn’t even trying to hide the obvious grin on his face.

“Whatever. Daishou lies all the time, his team is literally snakes,” Kenma said as he tucked the phone between his head and shoulder and picked his PSP up again.

“Yeah, but he was so hellbent on convincing us all, it seemed a bit weird. It could have been a prank call from someone else, but I don’t- oh my God. I’ll call you back, Kenma.”

“Okay? You don’t have to call me back, by the way. I don’t really care about what hap-”

The call ended, so Kenma let the phone drop from his shoulder and he refocused onto his game. Okay, he could do this.

  
  


**hottest boys in japan & lev**

rooster boi: Tsukki what the hell man

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: take those personal problems away from the good vibes we middle blockers radiate. last night we had a serious heartfelt talk

onion head: What are you talking about??? 

onion head: We got into an argument over who would look better in Twinkle Toes Sketchers???

miracle boy: did he stutter

boba ta: it wasnt even an argument it was a peaceful debate 

miracle boy: except for the part where taichi threatened to set fire to my dorm room and was restrained by ushiwaka of course~

rooster boi: K but wheres Tsukki?

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: lol try shorty and the pinch server

rooster boi: @shrimpyfries @gucci

gucci: Hello!

rooster boi: What did you guys do?

miracle boy: WHO ARE YOU I AM FROM ANCIENT GREECE

boba ta: lmao 

gucci: I don’t think I quite know what it is that you are referring to

shrimpyfries: I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO ANYTHING COOL WHILE IM GONE!!!!!!!!!!!

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: yea what the fuck dude

onion head: What is going on?

rooster boi: Tsukki wanted to call some people so I gave him a few numbers thinking that out of everyone he would do the least amount of damage to everything

rooster boi: But now Daishou won’t stop spamming me and I don’t want to deal with that snake’s bullshit rn

miracle boi: oh tea

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: rip

boba ta: f

shrimpyfries: whatd you guys do??????

gucci: Ok, I’m nice

gucci: We were playing truth or dare and I chose dare and we didn’t want to call Ushijima or Tendou or Bokuto, right?

miracle boi: wow

gucci: Nothing personal! Tsukki just hates you!

onion head: That… seems personal

miracle boi: thats fair i despise him with every fibre of my being and would commit several war crimes to just see the look on his face as i block a spike of his

boba ta: oh fun

gucci: n e ways

gucci: The last number left was Daishou, and we didn’t know who that was. So, I called him and panicked and said I was Kozume Kenma.

gucci: And the dare was to confess my love

gucci: So I did that

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: oh, wonderful

gucci: And he hung up and Tsukki convinced Kageyama to call Daishou and so he did and he also panicked and said he was Yaku

gucci: Then he said Kenma loves him and Daishou got mad and Kageyama didn't know what to do so he said it again and then he was hung up on

rooster boi: I cannot even begin to unpack that

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: we don’t have time to unpack ALL of that

onion head: I-

onion head: John Mulaney?

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: i should’ve known my favorite kouhai would be cultured

onion head: I’m not going to explain, but I was tricked into watching it to get better at English

miracle boi: i see no problems here

shrimpyfries: who?????

gucci: He’s a stand up comedian from America

shrimpyfries: stand up comedian? so he stands up and is funny?

rooster boi: That is literally it, yeah

boba ta: we are going to have a movie night with netflix party soon-

gucci: Hinata’s not very good with English, so I don’t know if it’ll work

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: it’s all good, i have all three netflix specials written down in japanese. i’ll just send it here and he can read as he watches

onion head: You are all way too eager to show him this

rooster boi: I’m pretty sure Lev and Inuoka haven’t seen it yet, so I’m cool with it

gucci: Anyways bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I'm gonna come clean and admit that I started editing and then gave up and posted it as it is before I could procrastinate, overthink, and delete the entire chapter or fic whoops  
> Please comment and say what you thought because this took days to write and took a total of fifteen minutes to give up on editing!


	6. the abc song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yoosung: There's a song and everything 
> 
> short king #3: oh ok! thanks that rlly helped!!!
> 
> KARASUNO FIGHTT
> 
> Captain oh captain: If Hinata sings some stupid ABC song one more time, I’m kicking him out again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this chapter is a lot shorter and is just an excuse to show off other chats. I'll be showing more and more of other chats and/or introducing more since these boys all know each other one way or another and sometimes I want a break from just the Karasuno first years. Also, there's a Mystic Messanger reference that I tried to explain, sorry if it still doesn't make sense or anything!

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

**iM tHe OlDeSt changed their name to short king #3**

aloe carrier: Ok, but why #3?

short king #3: nishinoya-senpai is 2

aloe carrier: Who's #1?

short king #3: hoshiumi

aloe carrier: Huh, I kinda thought it would be Yaku-san

short king: i wanna be 1!!!!!

aloe carrier: It's okay, Hinata! I don't like this username but I can't do anything about it

**dino boy renamed aloe carrier to kenma, apparently**

kenma, apparently: Ok, no

kenma, apparently: Honestly, Rika wouldn't of done this, you're not just like Rika

kenma, apparently: smh my head

**dino boy renamed kenma, apparently to yoosung**

dino boy: Happy?

yoosung: No, actually

short king #3: whos rika n yoosung???

yoosung: Yoosung is a fictional boy from a mobile game

dino boy: He has the worst route and compares you to his psychotic cousin, Rika, the entire time

yoosung: Says you! You refused to buy chats after missing them and let everyone spiral into thinking they're AIs!

dino boy: They. Are. AIs.

short king #3: im confuzed did he marry his cousin

anxious angel: no, he just really looked up to her

anxious angel: tsukishima! stop bullying yoosung!

ointment bearer: Youre all insane

ointment bearer: I want to change my name to if everyone else gets to

dino boy: Please, learn to write properly for the sake of your teachers and everyone else

short king #3: oh! that reminds me why i came here

**ointment bearer changed their name to Kageyama**

anxious angel: nooo, that's boring

**short king #3 renamed Kageyama to kags**

short king #3: ok good now let me finish

short king #3: ok so i need help

dino boy: obviously 

kags: I hate this let me change it

short king #3: uh im not finished

short king #3: so basically 

short king #3: im failing English

kags: Dumbass! Did u turn off my ability to change my name?!?!

yoosung: What part do you need help in?

short king #3: oh my gosh let me get there 

short king #3: since u guys wont stop being rude ill just shorten it. i need a good way to study but I dont like studying and the test is in a week or so so what should i do???

dino boy: Ask a third year, they'll care

anxious angel: try reading some books in english

short king #3: thanks but no 

kags: Use volleyball to help learn the letters 

short king #3: ive tried that and failed

yoosung: Oh! When I was trying to learn English, I watched shows and movies and stuff. Try doing that!

short king #3: oh like the dub of an anime?

dino boy: Do that

yoosung: Or you can watch something from an English speaking place that is definitely PG

yoosung: Or even one of those baby videos from America that teaches babies the alphabet 

yoosung: There's a song and everything 

short king #3: oh ok! thanks that rlly helped!!!

  
  


**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

Captain oh captain: If Hinata sings some stupid ABC song one more time, I’m kicking him out again.

freckles-kun uwu: No comment

Captain oh captain: Yamaguchi, did you do something?

freckles-kun uwu: He needed to learn, English, okay?

suga ooga booga: yama…

  
  


**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

dino boy: I knew this would happen

short king #3: abcdefghijk

short king #3: elemenopee

short king #3: qrstuvwxy nd z

yoosung: Ok, you know you’re ABCs. Good, please stop before I get into trouble

short king #3: SHHHH

short king #3: now i know my abcs

kags: Next time wont you sing with me

yoosung: No! Kageyama! Stop!

short king #3: no let him

anxious angel: hinata, did you teach kageyama the abc song?

short king: no i mentioned the song in the short kings chat and hoshiumi took it

kags: Hoshiumi-san taught it to us over call

dino boy: Who’s “us”

kags: Atsumu-san Sakusa-san Komori-san and me

short king #3: WOAH! THATS SO COOL!

dino boy: You idiots, Miya-san will take it to the setters and Komori-san will take it to the liberos

short king #3: i dont think sakusa-san will take it to the aces…

anxious angel: i’m confused, why is this bad?

yoosung: It’s more of an annoyance, but I’m glad it won’t make it to the middle blockers chat

short king #3: (✿◠‿◠) 

yoosung: Hinata-

  
  
  
  


**hottest boys in japan and lev**

shrimpyfries: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

four eyes: I hate it here

herecomesmattsundoodoodoo: oh, neat

  
  


**G̶y̶m̶ ̶3̶ Cool kidz 😎**

kurowo: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

AGHAASHEE: Please, don’t

bokutowo: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

AGAASHEE: Bokuto-san,,,

shouyowo: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

moon child: Great job, now it’s going to spread to the aces and captains

leaf: what is

shouyowo: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

leaf: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

shouyowo: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

AGHAASHEE: I don’t want this to come into the Fukurodani chat

AGHAASHEE: Oh my god, is it actually in the setter chat?

  
  


**take me down to the femboy hooters**

bestest ace: im sorry kaashi

pwetty setter: Bokuto-san, I’m begging you

kononoha: what’s going on?

bestest ace: [ https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo ](https://youtu.be/75p-N9YKqNo)

yukkipe: bokuto no

bestest ace: bokuto YES

yukkipe: bokuto

yukkipe: yes?

pwetty setter: Bokuto, NO

bestest ace: i said sorry!!!

pwetty setter: You wouldn’t have done it if you truly were sorry

bestest ace: akaashi please!!!

pwetty setter: It’s too late. You did it

kononoha: i hate that this will probably be the worst argument you two will ever have

bestest ace: this isnt an argument i promise 

pwetty setter: That isn’t how it works, Bokuto-san

bestest ace: how does it work

yukkipe: not that

bestest ace: kaashi pls set for me now i finished my homework!!

  
  


pwetty setter: Okay

kononoha: you’re joking, right?

yukkipe: you know they’re not


	7. short kings and m&m's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yoosung: Is it? I’ve never seen purple M&M’s
> 
> short king #3: a color in the regular m&m bag no special skins or dlcs
> 
> dino boy: Did you just call purple M&M’s DLCs?
> 
> kags: Whats a DLC?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, back at it again. I genuinely thought I updated this day before yesterday lol   
> Also, the groupchat name for the short kings is from TMG, artists and YouTubers I recommend for good comedy.

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

  
  


short king #3: ok pick a color

dino boy: No

kags: Why

short king #3: just pick one!!

yoosung: Um

yoosung: Purple?

anxious angel: teal!

short king #3: no another one

dino boy: What’s wrong with purple and teal?

dino boy: Nevermind, I don’t care

short king #3: pick a color that’s in m&ms

dino boy: Purple is an M&M color, genius

kags: Its not though

anxious angel: no, wait it is

yoosung: Is it? I’ve never seen purple M&M’s

short king #3: a color in the regular m&m bag no special skins or dlcs

dino boy: Did you just call purple M&M’s DLCs?

kags: Whats a DLC?

short king #3: it doesnt matter its just something kenma was talking about

short king #3: choose a color!!!!

yoosung: DLCs are like add ons to a game

anxious angel: yeah, when you buy one, it gives you more weapons, characters, etc.

kags: Ohhh ok

short king #3: pleaaaseee

anxious angel: sorry! ummm yellow?

yoosung: Green

dino boy: I’m not doing this

kags: If itll make you shut up

kags: Blue

short king #3: special thanks to everyone that participated

short king #3: ok the color that i picked was orange

yoosung: wdym

short king #3: i picked an m&m from my bag and i picked up orange so no one won

kags: Do it again

anxious angel: what happens when you pick one of our colors?

short king #3: whatever you want!

short king #3: as long as its possible for me to do ig

dino boy: For what reason?

short king #3: boredom??? idk did you want an essay?

dino boy: Would you want to write one?

short king #3: of course not 

dino boy: Red

short king #3: ok im goin again

yoosung: I’m strangely nervous

kags: Me too

kags: I dont even want anything

short king #3: brown!

anxious angel: no one chose brown

dino boy: Try again

short king #3: green!

yoosung: Yay!

kags: Damn it

dino boy: I really thought I would win

anxious angel: that was the most exciting thing that’s happened this week

yoosung: A lot has happened this week, are you sure this is the most exciting?

kags: Its hard to judge honestly

dino boy: I’m going to mute this chat soon if anything so stupid as the ABC song happens again

short king #3: aww u wont leave the chat? that means you love us!!!

yoosung: Tsukki, you love me?

dino boy: Maybe I will leave the chat

kags: Please do

anxious angel: he doesn’t mean that!

kags: No I do

short king #3: i do to but he loves us

dino boy: I don’t love anyone here

yoosung: Heart been broke so many times 

yoosung: I don’t know what to believe 

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

yoosung: Sorry, Tsukki!

short king #3: ok but what do u want guchi

yoosung: Oh, I don’t know if there’s anything I want

short king #3: rlly?

yoosung: Other than for you to add me into this “short kings” group chat so that I can see exactly what you guys are doing

short king #3: but your not short!!

anxious angel: **you’re not short

short king #3: i am!!! thats why im in the chat!!

dino boy: No-

short king #3: wdym no??

kags: Im confused

yoosung: Nevermind, just give me my stuff

short king #3: ok but if they kick me out ill cry

dino boy: Do it

kags: Make sure to send the screenshots over 

yoosung: Okay, I’m excited

short king #3: ok im gonna add you

  
  


**fun sized super nice guys**

**short king #3 added Yamaguchi Tadashi**

short king #2: Shoyo whyd you add yamaguchi?

short king #3: sorry noya senpai he chose the right color

short emperor: I don’t want to know what that means at all

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Wait, who’s the emperor?

short king #1: After DAYS of FIGHTING we decided it was yaku since he couldn’t be king #4

short emperor: And don’t forget that, prince

short king #3: yeah what he said!!

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Do you guys not like Hoshuimi?

short emperor: We don’t hate him

short king #3: hes cool!!

short king #3: its so frischrating

short king #2: yeah!!!

short emperor: *it’s so frustrating

short king #3: i dont know why you put a star there but yeah!!!

short king #1: U guys are so STUPID

short emperor: Spell a four syllable word without searching it up

short king #1: Stop making words up!

Yamaguchi Tadashi: I-

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Is this what usually happens?

short king #2: usually takeru says something, then komi comes in and adds a meme

short king #3: remember when we added that shiratorizawa coach as a joke??

short king #1: NO????!

Yamaguchi Tadashi: You did that??

short emperor: You weren’t here for that Hoshuimi

short king #2: know what yamaguchi? Youre an honorary short king

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Thanks?

short king #3: whats his number?

**short emperor renamed Yamaguchi Tadashi to short peasant**

short emperor: Good

short king #1: I like that

short king #3: congrats yamaguchi!!!

short peasant: Ok

  
  
  


**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

yoosung: I won’t say what happened, but now I’m an honorary short king and my name is short peasant

anxious angel: please, tell us what happened

yoosung: It was very frischrating

dino boy: I really hoped this wouldn’t happen

kags: Wait what happened?

short king #3: its a short king thing shhh

kags: Yamaguchi is taller than Daichi-san

dino boy: Aren’t we all?

anxious angel: i think i’m not

kags: I know youre not

short king #3: its ok yachi im not either

anxious angel: i’m shorter than you, hinata, i honestly don’t know if it is ok

short king #3: well ok

dino boy: I honestly don’t think it is either

short king #3: STUPIDSHIMA!

yoosung: Guys, let’s be a little mature

short king #3: sorry

short king #3: tsukishima you bastard.

kags: Is that what being more mature is?

yoosung: No, please don’t do that 

dino boy: You do know you’re not their parents, right?

anxious angel: actually, i think he’s usually the mom friend

kags: Usually?

anxious angel: my mom likes hinata a lot

short king #3: tell her im flattered but i honestly dont like older women and have a preference for dudes

dino boy: Yes, please, tell her that

yoosung: If I don’t control them at this point, who will?

dino boy: Daichi-san can solve everything afterwards

yoosung: Damage will be done, Tsukki

yoosung: Yachi’s mom would have Hinata turning her down for no reason if I weren’t here

short king #3: what happened

kags: Nothing go ahead and tell yachi’s mom you dont like her like that

yoosung: Kageyama! No!

anxious angel: hinata, if you told my mother that, she would beat me then you

short king #3: and i would tell her she cant do that without consent

kags: Oh my god

dino boy: I don’t think there is one

kags: I didnt ask for your religion

yoosung: Ok, Hinata, please tell me you’re joking

short king #3: i just joked 

yoosung: What about the thing about telling Yachi’s mom you don’t like her?

short king #3: why would i joke about that

anxious angel: i am leaving, i cannot handle this talk about my mother without either dying from laughter or crying the water out of my body

dino boy: I’m leaving too

kags: I needed to go anyways I gues I’ll go now

yoosung: I’m not dealing with this alone, bye

short king #3: this is very mean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I want to have at least two chapters already done after I post a chapter, which I getting harder to do as I get busier. I'm trying to make every chapter at least 1,000 words and make them seem a bit more natural rather than just forced comedy or stolen jokes. If I don't update for a bit, I promise you that another chapter will be up, I just haven't gotten two or more chapters done ahead of time. Anyways, please comment! I live off the comments and I reply to every. single. comment. I go back and read them all the time, they're really nice to see!


	8. captains and denial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dino boy: I can’t believe that any of those people managed to make friends
> 
> kags: I thought youre their friend
> 
> kags: Nvm i dont think you have any friends outside of the simp
> 
> yoosung: Dude what the hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit sooner than I planned, but I really wanted to update! I'm not entirely satisfied with this one and it just passes as 1000 words, but y'know what? I'll just have to live with it.  
> Btw, the Tokyo captain chat name is from the Battle of Tokyo stage play/Fukurodani stage play chant

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

short king #3: did u kno theres a tokyo captain gc with only three people in it and another tokyo captain gc with everyone in iit?

dino boy: I don’t doubt that, but how do you know?

yoosung: Who are the three captains?

kags: Why are you taking so long to answer?

short king #3: i was talkin with bokuto-san and he said that something was going on in the three captain tokyo chat

short king #3: and i asked him what that meant and he said it was the chat with a cat and a snake and the other chat was tokyo captains and vice captains

dino boy: It’s so crazy how you didn’t answer Yamaguchi’s question

kags: He didnt answer mine either

dino boy: I don’t blame him for that

short king #3: i did say who!

yoosung: It’s Bokuto, Kuroo, and?

short king #3: snake

dino boy: Ok, so Kuroo again?

yoosung: Tsukki-

kags: Oh wait I get it

dino boy: I don’t want to live in a world where Kageyama knows something that I don’t

kags: I know how to set

dino boy: Good for you

short king #3: wait who is it

kags: I think its that daishou guy

yoosung: Ohh

dino boy: I genuinely want to see those conversations

short king #3: me too! i bet its all cool volleyball stuff

yoosung: Not all volleyball, they have to be friends, right?

dino boy: I can’t believe that any of those people managed to make friends

kags: I thought youre their friend

kags: Nvm i dont think you have any friends outside of the simp

yoosung: Dude what the hell

short king #3: ahaha good one kageyama

short king #3: maybe i can ask them what they do?

dino boy: I may be curious, but I do not want to lose entire brain cells

kags: I cant believe youre implying you have more than one brain cell

yoosung: I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter

**Meanwhile….**

**tokyo showtime ‘n tokyo party time!!!!**

  
  


brokuto: GUYS

brokuto: ive been trying to get us all together for MONTHS

brokuto: one of you NEVER SHOWS

kubro: I have no idea what you’re referring to

brokuto: I DONT EVEN NOT WHAT YOU MEAN BY THAt

daibro: I know what you’re talking about and I choose not to be in the same place as that stray kitty

kubro: Well joke’s on you, I’m a dog person

daibro: I wasn’t even talking about that, nor did I ask, loser

brokuto: OH MY GOD PLEASE PLAY WITH ME BOTH OF YOU

daibro: You can’t control me

kubro: Bo I love you, but I’m afraid my hate outweighs my love

daibro: I won’t tell you I love you, but I definitely hate that liar more than anything

kubro: First of all, MY HAIR ISNT COUNTED IN MY HEIGHT

kubro: Secondly, I thought you love Mika

brokuto: im sad forever

kubro: wait actually?

brokuto: :(

daibro: Good

kubro: Ok well next time we meet I’m smashing a volleyball in your face

daibro: Like I did to your ace?

kubro: THAT DOESNT EVEN-

brokuto: ok im beter now kaashi is gonna play with me since you two LOSERS are being mean to each other

daibro: I-

kubro: Bo I thought you were bae

daibro: This isn’t even fair, we weren’t going to win nationals anyways

kubro: youve SAID THAT ALREADY

daibro: Bye

kubro: coward

daibro: SAY THAT TO MY FACE   
  


kubro: NO!

  
  
  


**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

  
  


anxious angel: hi guys!

yoosung: Hello!

short king #3: hi!!!

kags: You guys are so bright its hard to look at

anxious angel: thanks!

kags: Now I feel bad and I didnt even say anything wrong

dino boy: Yet

kags: Whats that supposed to mean

dino boy: Well, King, you might drive your spiker away

short king #3: kags and i are bffs i would never leave!

anxious angel: you did when he threw you like a ragdoll

yoosung: Oop-

short king #3: ok but i also hit back

short king #3: it did hurt tho…

kags: Sorry?

short king #3: maybe

dino boy: This is disgusting to look at

yoosung: Lol

anxious angel: are you guys dating?

kags: No

short king #3: almost though

anxious angel: almost??

short king #3: well a lot of ppl said wed be good together and we tried and its better as friends

dino boy: I hate how you made that sound mature

short king #3: I AM MATURE

kags: No youre not

yoosung: Sorry, Hinata, but you’re not the most mature

short king #3: kenma said that i look cool and mature when i try to focus on mario kart so ha!

dino boy: Oh, does he?

short king #3: yeah!!

anxious angel: wait, actually??

short king #3: yeah!! Kenmas also my bff!!

dino boy: Stop saying BFF, you sound like a Disney Channel teenager

short king #3: that isnt bad!!

kags: Isnt though

yoosung: I don’t think Kenma’s just your BFF

anxious angel: shh

anxious angel: let him figure out his feelings on his own!

short king #3: wait tell me whatre you guys talking about

anxious angel: nothing!

short king #3: hnng

**short king #3 renamed anxious angel to anxious demon**

dino boy: Really?

short king #3: tell mmeee

kags: Youre such a dumbass sometimes

kags: *all the time

short king #3: fine kenmas calling me anyways

yoosung: Okay then, Hinata

anxious demon: have fun hinata :)

short king #3: i will!!!

anxious demon: good!

short king #3: no im mad at you 

anxious demon: i love you <3

short king #3: ughghgh

short king #3: i love you too

yoosung: Well, I need to go meet Shimada-san, so I’ll see you guys later!

anxious demon: bye!!

anxious demon: did you want me to tell you i love you too?

yoosung: …

yoosung: Could you?

anxious: love you yamaguchi, bye bye!

dino boy: I’m guessing you’re waiting for me

yoosung: :D

dino boy: No

yoosung: D:

  
  
  
  


**tsukki ❤️**

tsukki ❤️: Love you

tadashi: Love you too!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I only have two more chapters after this and I'm working on a one-shot that I may or may not post, so I don't know how long until the next chapter. I can assure you that it won't be a week or more, though, so hopefully I can get at least another chapter done or finish and/or post the one-shot!


	9. late night convos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short king #3: shes a toddler she can take a few dunks into the toilet 
> 
> kags: Ugh that happened to me before
> 
> yoosung: You fell into a toilet?
> 
> kags: No a pond

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Mentions of homophobia and panic attacks. To skip past that, start at 'short king #3: GUYS'  
> Okay, I'm still not entirely proud with this but I wanted to post things. Hopefully I can get a chapter I'm happy with out next lol

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

**anxious demon changed their name to anxious angel**

anxious angel: me? having a panic attack after spiraling over god knows what? it's more likely than you think 😎

yoosung: Bitch, me too

dino boy: Did you want to talk about it?

anxious angel: me?

dino boy: Both of you guys

dino boy: I guess we joke and stuff, but we are friends and I guess I care about you 

yoosung: Go ahead, Yachi!

anxious angel: well, i guess i was getting scared that my mom would find out that i'm dating kiyoko, which is a regular fear

anxious angel: but i somehow got to the conclusion that kiyoko doesn't actually like me at all and just pities me and that my mom will hate me and stuff

anxious angel: it's sounds stupid when i say it

yoosung: It's not stupid at all

yoosung: I also have attacks with similar thoughts and it helps to have Tsukki there to comfort me, whether I want to talk about it or not

yoosung: You can continue to rant to us, or maybe try confiding in Kiyoko?

dino boy: I agree with Yamaguchi

dino boy: These thoughts are normal and you're not alone, but having someone to share them with make them a little better

dino boy: We're fine with being those people for you, Yachi

yoosung: We love you and will always be here for you ♥️

short king #3: GUYS

short king #3: its late night and my sister woke me up bc shes scared of the dark and wanted me to take her to the bathroom and she had a blanket around her and i told her that she would trip and she wouldnt believe me and she tripped face first into the toilet skbhskjs

short king #3: oh wait sorry was this serious talk time?

yoosung: I-

yoosung: Okay, that's funny but did she get hurt?

anxious angel: i know you didn't realize what was going on, but that made me laugh, thanks hinata 

dino boy: I don't blame her for not believing you, you're wrong a lot

short king #3: im in high school and shes three how could I be wrong??

short king #3: and no problem yachi 😘

yoosung: Was she okay???

short king #3: shes a toddler she can take a few dunks into the toilet 

kags: Ugh that happened to me before

yoosung: You fell into a toilet?

kags: No a pond

yoosung: You fell into a pond

kags: Yeah

anxious angel: may i press for details?

dino boy: How exactly did you manage to fall into a pond in similar fashion to Hinata's younger sister falling into a toilet?

kags: I was walking around with the picnic blanket around me and my sister tripped me when I got near the pond

dino boy: And was she congratulated?

kags: Haha 

short king #3: im glad i know this now

yoosung: I'm sure it will come in handy

kags: Oh great

anxious angel: i can't relate, i'm a lonely child

yoosung: Me too

short king #3: dont you mean only child??

yoosung: Same difference

kags: Werent you friends with Tsukishima when you were a kid?

short king #3: yeah! you guys r like siblings! bros!

yoosung: Yeah, but no because we're dating

anxious angel: i was gonna say

dino boy: Why are you even debating it?

short king #3: do u have a sibling??

yoosung: He does, an older brother

kags: Sometimes i wish i had an older brother 

dino boy: Don't 

short king #3: hey!!! whats wrong with older brothers

dino boy: Everything

dino boy: Every sine thing

yoosung: Well, no

yoosung: His hair is really nice!

anxious angel: did he do something to you?

yoosung: Oh boy

short king #3: whatd he do punch you??

kags: You had that coming

dino boy: You two are annoying

yoosung: Then why do you continue to talk to them?

short king #3: i wanna do it!!

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

kags: Huh??

short king #3: shut up Yamaguchi!

short king #3: damnit

anxious angel: it's okay hinata, there's always next time!

yoosung: Uh

yoosung: Sorry, Tsukki

short king #3: im so bored

dino boy: It's 2 in the morning, just shut your mouth and go to bed

kags: You arent asleep either

anxious angel: he has a point

yoosung: We can move our chat to the team chat so more people can join

short king #3: yaaay

  
  


**KARASUNO FIGHTT**

  
  


sunshine child: ok now what

freckles-kun uwu: We wait?

stingyshima: I hate that I'm ok with that

child of god: i wonder who will join us

sunshine child: sugawara-san?

bakayama: Maybe or maybe itll be tanaka-san or nishinoya-san since they go to bed late

suga ooga booga: what're you guys doing up?

freckles-kun uwu: Sugawara-san!!

sunshine child: kageyama fell into a pond!

bakayama: I only said that because your sister fell into a toilet!

suga ooga booga: is kageyama in a pond??

suga ooga booga: is your sister in a toilet???

child of god: no, kageyama fell into a pond at one point in a very similar way that hinata's little sister did half an hour ago

stingyshima: Don't explain any more than that, this is great

freckles-kun uwu: Don't worry! Hinata's sister is fine

suga ooga booga: ok???

bakayama: To quote a dumbass

bakayama: shes a toddler she can take a few dunks into the toilet 

suga ooga booga: man, i wish asahi, daichi, and i did shit like that when we were first years

stingyshima: Fall into bodies of water and/or toilets?

freckles-kun uwu: It's not too late to do that

sunshine child: really?

sunshine child: i can let natsu explain how she did it if you would like

suga ooga booga: please don't that wasn't what i was talking about

bakayama: Yeah moron he was being sarcastic

sunshine child: which he?? were all hes!!

child of god: okay then

freckles-kun uwu: Are you still bored, Hinata?

suga ooga booga: what's going on?

sunshine child: actually a little yeah

suga ooga booga: well, i need to go sleep now

suga ooga booga: bye losers :)

bakayama: Bye 

sunshine child: im

sunshine child: bye suga-san D:

freckles-kun uwu: Wanna call? Just the five of us?

child of god: four, actually. i need to double-check my homework then go to bed

freckles-kun uwuw: Awww ok

stingyshima: Why is our mission curing Hinata's boredom?

bakayama: Why isnt it

sunshine child: awwwwww thanks kageyama!!!

bakayama: Silence idiot

stingyshima: Fine

freckles-kun uwu: You didn't take a lot of convincing, Tsukki 

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ is calling…**

Each of the boys answered the call right as it came in.

"Shut up, Yamaguchi," Tsukishima said.

"Sorry, Tsukki!" Yamaguchi instantly replied.

"Hey, guys!" Hinata greeted, whispering into his phone.

His face wasn't visible. In fact, nothing was visie, except for what was probably his bright orange hair, the only way to know that it wasn't just a pitch black room in view.

"What is this, ASMR? Stop whispering," Tsukishima scolded, holding his headphones away from his ears.

“I can’t, my sister and mom are asleep!” The orange-haired boy hissed, causing the other three boys to flinch from the crackling whisper.

The call continued with less conversation and more of a collection of unrelated sentences with large yawns and pauses.

“I can’t even keep my eyes open-” Yamaguchi let out a long yawn, “-anymore. Are you happy now, Hinata?”

Hinata shook his head and grunted. “I’m still bored.”

“Do you have insomnia or something? Just go to bed,” Kageyama said.

Hinata groaned and lied back in his bed, the phone now above him, and said, “I just can’t stop thinking.”

“That’s a surprise,” Tsukishima commented, no bite behind his words.

“About what?” Yamaguchi prompted, resting his head in his hand, eyelids drooping.

“You’re gonna laugh at me,” Hinata muttered, glaring as Tsukishima said something that sounded close to, “probably.”

“I’m too tired to have emotions, just go off.” Kageyama used his hand to stifle a yawn.

“Kenma’s annoying.”

That seemed to shock his teammates, as Tsukishima’s eyes widened, Yamaguchi began coughing, and Kageyama’s mouth opened, agape. Hinata just looked away from the screen.

“How so?” Yamaguchi asked once he regained his breath.

“He just, ugh!’” Hinata yelled, or, rather, said at a normal volume, considering he had been whispering. “I can’t stop thinking about him, and earlier we were texting and he invited me over to sleep at his house! And then, he said he was looking forward to having me over!”

Tsukishima raised an eyebrow. “So? That just means you’re friends.”

“He calls me Shouyou!”

“You let him,” Yamaguchi pointed out.

“Whenever I go to hug him, he lets me!” 

“You don’t seem angry about this,” Kageyama observed.

“I’m not!”

“Oh?” Tsukishima asked, a smirk slowly growing. “Are you excited? Do you _want_ to go sleep over at his house?”

“I’m not bored anymore!” Hinata squeaked.

“Hinata, don’t you dare hang up-”

One of the boxes disappeared, leaving Yamaguchi, Tsukishima, and Kageyama.

“Thank God, I can finally rest,” The blond boy grumbled.

**Call ended**

yoosung: We’re definitely talking about this at school

short king #3: have fun talkin bout me without me

kags: Youre immmature

dino boy: How did you even spell that wrong?

short king #3: gnight love you

dino boy: No

kags: Youre such a dumbass

yoosung: He said fondly

yoosung: Goodnight <3

kags: Goodnight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, school is starting back soon and I'm doing a lot of extra programs before and during that time, so I'm apologizing in advance if I cannot update regularly with chapters that are long enough or of good quality. Anyways, please comment if you liked this and I just wanna thank everyone who has commented, bookmarked, subscribed, and left kudos. This chatfic isn't a lot, but it's really nice knowing people enjoy my content.


	10. smooshed cake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sketchy guy: Guys is it possible to break someone's butt
> 
> iwa zoom: Please give context 
> 
> hoot hoot mfs: y e s

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh you guys it's been so long! I feel so bad, it's basically been a week and here I am only just posting a new chapter. I honestly really like this one, I've been waiting to add in the aces, I love them so much.   
> Also, big warning if you haven't read the manga but the end, starting at 'kags: What are you gonna do? Move countries once you graduate?' is the start of me being really sad bc I had just read 402 and then started writing lol

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

yoosung: Hurry say something reassuring 

anxious angel: why, what happened?

kags: You probably wont get sold in human trafficking 

yoosung: That doesn't help

kags: I wont sell you 

yoosung: That wasn't a worry, but now it is

anxious angel: why don't you explain what happened?

yoosung: I was walking outside and I ran into Asahi

anxious angel: great start, why is this bad tho?

kags: Asahi is scared of his shadow I dont think you need help 

yoosung: Wow, if only I could finish my story 

anxious angel: ok, sorry, continue 

yoosung: All good

yoosung: So I ran into him and I fell and kind of shrieked and then I was on my butt

kags: Oh so you actually ran into him

yoosung: What did I say????

anxious angel: just continue 

yoosung: I fell and I had a packaged cupcake thing from a convenience store in my back pocket that smooshed 

yoosung: So I sadly cursed and said I smooshed my cake

anxious angel: oh no

yoosung: And so Asahi was really confused but got scared that I genuinely hurt my ass

yoosung: And then he gave me one thousand yen and speed walked away looking very scared 

yoosung: And I don't know what I did 

kags: You should be glad that hinata isnt online 

yoosung: I am but also where's my reassurance?

anxious angel: well, don't spin this out of proportion. I don't think that asahi-san would go too crazy over a small interaction, since you guys are on the same team and stuff.

yoosung: Yeah, you're right 

yoosung: He probably moved on or something and here I am panicking 

kags: Yeah and you wont get sold 

yoosung: Why do you have such a fixation on this?

  
  


***

💪😎

  
  


sketchy guy: Guys is it possible to break someone's butt

iwa zoom: Please give context 

hoot hoot mfs: y e s

iwa zoom: Please

iwa zoom: Give context

sketchy guy: I was on a walk and I got lost in thought and I kinda bumped into one of our first years and he screamed and fell

iwa zoom: Ok, was he hurt?

sketchy guy: He said fuck I smooshed my cake and then I gave him money and ran

iwa zoom: he said what

sketchy guy: fuck

sketchy guy: I smooshed my cake

sketchy guy: Is he ok???

city boi: His cake is smooshed so obviously not

hoot hoot mfs: what if he was talking about literal cake???

sketchy guy: I don't think he was

sketchy guy: Was he?

iwa zoom: We weren't there, no one knows what you're talking about 

city boi: lmao just talk to him he can't beat you up or anything 

sketchy guy: I'm not scared of him beating me up, but he is a pinch server with a pretty good serve 

sketch guy: I'm scared his boyfriend will beat me up

hoot hoot mfs: wait who are these people?

sketchy guy: Yamaguchi got his cake smooshed and now Tsukishima is going to kill me

iwa zoom: …

iwa zoom: Listen, I'm out 

hoot hoot mfs: NO!

hoot hoot mfs: remember the rules iwazumi

iwa zoom: Bokuto, I nicely explained to you that I would not abide by the ace rules 

hoot hoot mfs: yeah and then guess what you did?? 

city boi: did he abide by the ace rules?

hoot hoot mfs: yeah I think 

sketchy guy: Help me

hoot hoot mfs: NEVER abandon an ace in need 

iwa zoom: He needs god not a bro

hoot hoot mfs: don't make me fish out my weapons 

iwa zoom: excuse me 

sketchy guy: Wait please help me 

sketchy guy: Iwaizumi, you're the only one here who can help me

city boi: huh???

city boi: wtf no I can help 

city boi: I've helped my bois so many times and here you are dumping me for one of my own bois

hoot hoot mfs: i don't know what he said but i say the same thing!

iwa zoom: What weapons do you have against me?

hoot hoot mfs: four words

hoot hoot mfs: captains group chat

sketchy guy: Bokuto, that's three

hoot hoot mfs: SHHH wait you interrupted me

hoot hoot mfs: oikawa

iwa zoom: I'm sitting next to him what're you gonna do

sketchy guy: Y'know this is actually helping me get my mind off whatever I just did

hoot hoot mfs: i lent him yukkipe's money and now he owes me

hoot hoot mfs: hah

city boi: OOO

iwa zoom: lol ok 

iwa zoom: Bye

hoot hoot mfs: oh you have to go?

hoot hoot mfs: bye bye!!

sketchy guy: Bokuto

sketchy guy: I don't think he had to go, I think he just wanted to leave us

city boi: wait WHAT

hoot hoot mfs: I have to go get akaashi now goodbye forever :(

city boi: I'm gonna go work out bye my bro 

sketchy guy: Oh 

sketchy guy: bye??

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**

dino boy: I have a question 

short king #3: yea you are Stoopid

dino boy: Ok, I'm ignoring you 

dino boy: I have a question 

kags: Yes you are stupid 

dino boy: I’ve been waiting for a time in my life where I can finally fully ignore you without Yamaguchi telling me not to

dino boy: Now, I have a question for the only two people in the group chat, Yachi and Yamaguchi

anxious angel: yamaguchi is helping sugawara-san with something rn

dino boy: Literally, I just want to know why one of my dinosaur figurines in gone

kags: I think you mean dinasore toys

anxious angel: i think you mean dinosaur toys

short king #3: ahahah yama look at that you spelled it wrong

dino boy: I just want to know if anyone knows who took it

dino boy: Sorry, I just want to know if Yachi knows who took it

short king #3: well only yamaguchi goes to your house so its probably him

kags: Dont you have a brother?

kags: My sister used to take my volleyball from my room to get me to to chores

dino boy: Y’all hear sumn?

yoosung: Oh! Didn’t you tell Akiteru that you would go with him to that movie?

dino boy: I haven’t spoken to him in two days, I have no clue what you’re referring to

anxious angel: you haven’t talked to your brother in two days???

dino boy: Not directly, no. I don’t think I’ve had any real conversations with him in four days.

short king #3: i accidentally broke my sisters jump rope and she tried doing that to me but then she got a new one and hit me with it so i would play with her

yoosung: Oh, fun

kags: How did the thing with Asahi go?

dino boy: Before topics change, are you sure that Akiteru took my dinosaur figurine?

yoosung: Toy, but yes

dino boy: Ok, bye

yoosung: Basically, Asahi and I avoided each other all of practice and I guess Daichi-san and Sugawara-san assumed something was up

kags: They wouldnt be wrong 

short king #3: shhh let him finish

yoosung: So Sugawara-san pulled me aside and interrogated me about what happened

anxious angel: oh, so you told him asahi-san smooshed your cake 

yoosung: Yes

kags: Wait actually?

short king #3: uhh what did sugawara-san say??

yoosung: He started laughing because he knew I was talking about a cupcake and knew Asahi didn't 

anxious angel: then what happened?

yoosung: I don’t even know

short king #3: nooo tell me tell me tell me

kags: I cant beleive youre annoying over text and in real life

anxious angel: *believe

kags: I dont know how you expect me to remember that

yoosung: The best part of believe is the lie

anxious angel: sHE beLIEveD

short king #3: whats s beve

kags: Dumbass! Its obviously sbeve!

yoosung: ...no

anxious angel: just continue with your story lol

yoosung: Well, they made Asahi-san and I talk to each other in front of them, which was very not nice

anxious angel: please stop saying short things with no meaning. say the full story or say nothing at all.

yoosung: Jfc I’ll just say nothing at all.

short king #3: no continue!!!

yoosung: Basically, Asahi shared his worries of breaking my butt and then throwing money and running away and I explained that I simply crushed a dessert in my pocket when I fell and it made me very angy

kags: Oh that sounds great

anxious angel: and that’s it?

yoosung: My life isn’t a soap opera, Yachi, don’t expect a five page story from a small moment in my life

short king #3: it would be pretty fun tho!!

yoosung: Ya know what? Yeah, that would be cool

kags: He said fun not cool

anxious angel: is there a difference?

short king #3: “is there a difference”

short king #3: one is as nice as a hobby and done in free time while the other can be taken as flashy or epic. while something cool can be fun not everything clashes and i did not mean for them to clash

yoosung: I hate it here

dino boy: Finally, you understand my pain

yoosung: Tsukki!!

yoosung: How did it go with your brother?

kags: Can you beLIEveD the change in tone?

anxious angel: he went from an exhausted terrible storyteller to pure boyfriend in 0.02 seconds

short king #3: for tsukishima to

short king #3: tsukishima

dino boy: Funny how I remember you doing something similar while talking with Kenma

anxious angel: oh?

short king #3: jokes on u im fully realized now

kags: Oh thank god

yoosung: So you two are dating?

short king #3: we arent not dating

dino boy: The opposite of not dating is dating

dino boy: I have a feeling that you are not dating

short king #3: yea well i have a feeling that u should shut up and tell everyone what happened with ur brother

dino boy: What do you want me to do?

kags: Huh???

dino boy: You said shut up and tell everyone, only of those is possible

anxious angel: please,,, just tell the fricking story

yoosung: Oh no, now you know it’s serious 

anxious angel: i can’t tell if you’re mocking me or not and while it bothers me, i just wanna know what happened

anxious angel: my life isn’t nearly as exciting as you guys, just let me hear your dumb adventures

dino boy: Akiteru will be rooming with Tenma-san for two days

kags: Whos Tenma?

dino boy: He’s some manga writer my brother went to school with

dino boy: He “played” volleyball with him too

anxious angel: “played”??

short king #3: doesnt ur brother have a job???

yoosung: I’m surprised you managed to make all this happen over a dinosaur toy

kags: You kicked your brother out for two days to stay with a manga writer because he took your dinosaur toy to get you to do something?

anxious angel: i am so so confused, what does he mean by “played”

yoosung: Long story

anxious angel: ok??

short king #3: im so glad natsu is small and loves me

dino boy: You’re also small and I doubt she loves you enough to not kick you out

short king #3: then ill just go before she has the chance to make those choices

kags: What are you gonna do? Move countries once you graduate?

yoosung: It’d be pretty funny if you do end up moving countries when you graduate and remember this conversation

anxious angel: i’ve known you guys for less than a year, but i cannot imagine any of you going away

short king #3: if i left id have to come back

short king #3: i dont think i can beat kageyama all the way from america

kags: You know how professional volleyball works right

dino boy: I don’t think I can imagine you two going up against each other in Japan, let alone see you two on TV on national teams

yoosung: If you two ever make it to where you can play against each other on a pro team, I’ll be there in person!

anxious angel: oh! me too!

dino boy: It’s crazy how we suddenly started supporting each other from a simple comment about moving countries

short king #3: oh? so you would support me if i ever went against kageyama?

dino boy: I’d rather see you two work all the way up to beat each other and end up on the same team again

yoosung: But still on a pro team?

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

yoosung: Sorry, Tsukki!

anxious angel: as my name would suggest, all this talk about these crazy hypotheticals are making me anxious

short king #3: its all good yachi! i think that we all will be pretty good in the future! 

short king #3: i think all of us will stay friends forever!

dino boy: I hope not

yoosung: It’s wrong to lie, Tsukki

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

kags: Again?

yoosung: Sorry, Tsukki!

anxious angel: again.

dino boy: Well, I’m going to go

dino boy: If I have to talk about this more than we already are, I think that I might burst

yoosung: From tears, knowing that we could all stay friends and we’ll all be safe in the future, even if one of us moves for a bit or forever?

dino boy: Tadashi, do I have to say it again?

short king #3: oooh yamaguchi ur in troubleee

kags: Im going too if I have to beat Hinata in the future I need to practice now

short king #3: bold of you to assume that youd ever lose against me!

short king #3: im going to go practice to

anxious angel: ok, bye bye you guys!

yoosung: Tsukki, wanna come over? 

dino boy: Sure, I’ll be there in a few minutes

yoosung: Bye Yachi!

anxious angel: byee!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have two more chapters lined up after this and one currently being made, so hopefully I can finish that one and post a new chapter sooner than a week later. Please tell me if you like this or not, the comments literally are the reason I remembered to even update this before it became a full week! You guys are so nice and I appreciate all the kudos, bookmarks, comments, and subscribes this fic gets. Thanks!


	11. dork

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short king #3: i trusted tsukishima
> 
> dino boy: A horrible thing
> 
> dino boy: I never told you to

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this took so long! I didn't realize how many days passed until I actually went to check out how everything on this fic is going. Anyways, I'll explain everything more at the end, enjoy!

**ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ**   
  


short king #3: have you ever been snaked by a friend and just for the clout they do it again

kags: excuse me??

anxious angel: what happened???

yoosung: Hinata, you can’t come and say things without explaining whether they’re random or have background

yoosung: No one can ever tell with you

dino boy: Ignore him, he’s bringing in things from other chats

anxious angel: do i have to explain the thing about not having a life again? just tell me what’s happening!

short king #3: i trusted tsukishima

dino boy: A horrible thing

dino boy: I never told you to

yoosung: Ok, but which chat and what happened?

short king #3: miyagi first year training camp after hours chat

kags: Why is the title so long?

anxious angel: what did you guys name you chat?

kags: I didnt name it

dino boy: Please, enlighten us

kags: Its called camp

yoosung: No, it isn’t

yoosung: You’re joking

kags: I didnt name it!

anxious angel: what did tsukishima do?

short king #3: lied about me and exposed me at the same time

dino boy: I simply mentioned his huge ass crush on Kenma and his gay panic as he let his younger sister fall into a toilet

kags: And what did everyone else say?

short king #3: only two people defended me!!

dino boy: Bowl Cut and Angry Bird

short king #3: no goshiki and koganegawa who are better than you in every way

dino boy: They’re not even middle blockers

yoosung: I think he means in character

anxious angel: woah, you’re not going to defend him?

yoosung: I mean, I probably will, but like

yoosung: I get it, I guess

kags: Im so glad youre self aware

dino boy: There’s a reason half the chats I’m in are muted

short king #3: are we unmuted??

dino boy: About to be muted, actually

anxious angel: i appreciate that we aren’t muted yet

dino boy: I’m in chat settings right now, but sure

short king #3: waaaiiit listen to my story!!!

yoosung: I thought that was it?

kags: Hes so dramatic I expected he would make this into something bigger

short king #3: kindaichi and kunimi started bullying me!

kags: Whats new

short king #3: and then the third years from seijoh found out somehow

anxious angel: i’m sure they hate us

short king #3: matsukawa-san started bullying me in the middle blocker chat!

yoosung: Oh, good

yoosung: I saw that but I decided not to ask

dino boy: You take a bit of teasing and call it bullying?

kags: You cant trust bullys talking about bullying

short king #3: yea!!!

dino boy: I’ll admit, I was a bit hesitant

dino boy: But I muted this chat and the Miyagi first year one for good measure

short king #3: ughhh

  
  


**miyagi first year training camp after hours**

proud ball boy: tsukki muted us!!!

don’t call me derp: and?

angy birdy: aww :)

coconut cut: :)?

angy birdy: i meant :( but it autocorrected

daichi kinnie: It’s crazy that your frowny faces autocorrect to smiley faces

don’t call me derp: it’s crazy how your name autocorrects to onion head on my phone

daichi kinnie: haha you’re so funny

daichi kinnie: Does it actually?

don’t call me derp: i changed it in settings but yea

proud ball boy: dont u guys even care!?!?

angy birdy: i do!!

coconut cut: He seems like the type to mute chats

don’t call me derp: you seem like the type to say grr over text when angry

coconut cut: I do not! Tendou-san does!

don’t call me derp: don’t you like worship the ground he walks?

daichi kinnie: No, I cannot believe you forgot

daichi kinnie: He’s an ace better than Ushijima, remember

don’t call me derp: how rude of me

proud ball boy: i used to think kindaichi was the nice one…

angy birdy: i used to think they were nice!

coconut cut: I hate it here

coconut cut: Why am I always bullied?!?!

proud ball boy: i think ur so cool goshiki!! at least u werent bullied by ur own teammate!!

coconut cut: You do?

coconut cut: Wait no don’t look at the last text!

coconut cut: Ha! I know I’m cool!

angy birdy: i think you’re cool too goshiki!!!

coconut cut: Yeah!

daichi kinnie: Well, it isn’t hard to get compliments from those two

don’t call me derp: you’re still coming down from when oikawa-san and iwaizumi-san complimented you in one day

daichi kinnie: Shut up that was the best day of my life

angy birdy: aren’t you guys dating? wouldn’t the day you guys started dating be the best day of your life?

proud ball boy: is that how that works?

coconut cut: i think when ushijima-san said he was counting on me was the best day of my life

angy birdy: really?

don’t call me derp: i honestly expected that that would the best day of his life, he’s a dork

proud ball boy: dork means whale penis!

daichi kinnie: I’m out

coconut cut: How do you know that?

proud ball boy: bokuto-san told me!

angy birdy: how did he find out?

proud ball boy: he didnt say…

proud ball boy: ill ask!

don’t call me derp: yea no im out too

  
  


**MY MENTOR THE BESTEST ACE**

MY GREATEST DISCIPLE THE BESTEST SON: bokuto-san!

MY MENTOR THE BESTEST ACE: yes my disciple!!!

MY GREATEST DISCIPLE THE BESTEST SON: howd you find out the thing about dork?

MY MENTOR THE BESTEST ACE: oh

MY MENTOR THE BESTEST ACE: i forgot…

MY GREATEST DISCIPLE THE BESTEST SON: thats ok! i can wait if you remember!

MY MENTOR THE BESTEST ACE: YAY! Ill go ask kaashi!!

  
  


**do NOT tell daichi-san or suga-san**

bokutoes: AKGASHHI!

akaashtea: Yes, Bokuto-san?

bokutoes: how did i find out about the thing about dorks and whales?

showoah: akaashi-san! goshiki and koganegawa are waitintg for my answer!!

bokutoes: kaaashii! our little hinata is making friends!!!

akaashtea: I wish I could correct you on that but this entire chat proves me wrong

akaashtea: I think I remember Kuroo-san telling you that fact

bokutoes: no no no i think i knew it before that!

akaashtea: What’s your earliest memory involving it?

bokutoes: i think my first year in high school

akaashtea: Bokuto-san

bokutoes: yeah!

akaashtea: You do know that I am a year younger than you, correct?

showoah: aw man! it was a good try!

bokutoes: i remember that ur younger than me but i always forget you werent ALWAYS there!

bokutoes: guess u just have that cool affect kaaashhi!! i dont even wanna think about the time before you!!!

akaashtea: Oh

akaashtea: Thank you

bokutoes: im the best boyfriend ever right!!!

akaashtea: I haven’t been in any relationships like this before, Bokuto-san

bokutoes: aw man

akaashtea: You are the best boyfriend, though

bokutoes: yay!!

showoah: i came here to find out about whale penises and instead im subjected to this

showoah: is it peni?

akaashtea: It’s better to just not say it

bokutoes: but what is it?

akaashtea: It’s penises, not peni

showoah: cool! ill go tell em!

  
  


**miyagi first year training camp after hours**

proud ball boy: its penises not peni!

angy birdy: oh that’s cool!

coconut cut: That wasn’t what we asked though

proud ball boy: what did we ask??

coconut cut: Nevermind

coconut cut: Bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this fic might not get updated for a couple of days, maybe a week, because I've been doing BokuAka Week (I'm still writing day 3 uwu I'm so good at this) and my extra educational programs are getting a bit more rigorous now. I will try to get things on time but I'm pretty sure I've been warning for a while that school will inevitably make updating hard but until it all starts I won't know how hard.  
> Anyways, that was pretty long but I just wanted to thank everyone who's commented, bookmarked, or left kudos! They're really cool to look back on and brighten my day.


	12. just height

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yoosung: Would that, by extension, mean short people live longer?
> 
> anxious angel: i think they both die early if it’s an extreme shortness or tallness
> 
> short king #3: is tallness a thing?
> 
> kags: So average height will make you immortal?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm back! If anyone cares for my excuse for being gone so long, it'll be at the end. Sorry for the delay, I'll be back to updating hopefully once a week!

anxious angel: if i remove myself from the chat, do not be alarmed

yoosung: Ok???

kags: Are you involved in something?

anxious angel: my mom has started going through my phone

short king #3: why???

anxious angel: i’m pretty sure she’s convinced i’m either in a relationship with one of you or all of you

kags: All of us??

short king #3: that would be horrible i dont wanna think about kissing tsukishima

yoosung: Only Tsukki?

short king #3: yeah that would be gross

dino boy: I’m genuinely so happy to hear that

kags: I agree

dino boy: I’m overjoyed.

short king #3: sound more excited!!

dino boy: I’M OVERJOYED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dino boy: Happy?

short king #3: yea actually

dino boy: Oh, joy

yoosung: No offense to you guys, but I don’t think I could kiss any of you without dying from embarrassment 

kags: I dont think I can kiss any of you period

short king #3: you guys wouldnt even give my cheek a smooch???

short king #3: my forehead???

yoosung: Well, I would do that

dino boy: I don’t think I would kiss you again if your lips touched that tangerine’s skin

kags: That sounds like a you problem

dino boy: You want to know why it sounds like a me problem? It is a me problem.

short king #3: wth no yamaguchi would be blessed if i ever said the words “plant it on me baby” to him

yoosung: Is that seriously how you initiate kisses?

kags: Sadly speaking from expire yes

dino boy: Oh god guys he’s speaking from expire it must be bad

short king #3: how dare you say sadly i am angelic

kags: Bitch where

yoosung: I still haven’t recovered from “plant it on me baby” and ‘expire’ wait

dino boy: No, but for real I don’t think I could look at you the same if you even kissed Hinata

yoosung: If I kissed him even after he uttered those words, I also wouldn’t look at me the same

kags: I cant look at myself the same 

short king #3: im

short king #3: you guys r boolies

short king #3: high school

short king #3: fuckin

short king #3: BOOLIES

anxious angel: n e ways

anxious angel: how have you guys been?

short king #3: im convinced lev is a wizard

dino boy: Cool, no one asked

yoosung: Please elaborate 

dino boy: Don’t encourage this

kags: Ugh I kind of want to know to

short king #3: he grew a whole 0.1 centimeter!!

anxious angel: that doesn’t sound like a lot, hinata

short king #3: but it is!

dino boy: Here’s the thing, though

dino boy: It isn’t

kags: Dont tall people die sooner

dino boy: A comforting thought whenever I have to talk to you guys

yoosung: Would that, by extension, mean short people live longer?

anxious angel: i think they both die early if it’s an extreme shortness or tallness

short king #3: is tallness a thing?

kags: So average height will make you immortal?

yoosung: Y’know what? 

yoosung: Yeah

dino boy: Everyone here is screwed then

anxious angel: i would argue that this means sugawara-san will possibly live the longest out of us all

anxious angel: oh! and kiyoko-san!

short king #3: are you going to die before kiyoko-san bc of your extra shortness?

dino boy: Why would you phrase it that way?

short king #3: are you going to die before kiyoko-san bc you fail to be average height?

yoosung: I’m so glad I’m only a short peasant

kags: Why are we still talking about height??

dino boy: It’s Hinata’s entire personality

kags: Its your entire personality to make fun of height 

yoosung: Oop-

short king #3: tell him kageyama!

kags: Its not fun when you encourage it like that

short king #3: oh ok

short king #3: dont do it kageyama!

kags: Youre such a dumbass

dino boy: When Hinata dies from one too many volleyballs to the face, you’ll stand up to speak and simply say “Boke Hinata boke”

short king #3: if i die i dont think id let you speak since youd probably say something stupid like that

anxious angel: if?

yoosung: May I speak at this hypothetical funeral, Hinata?

short king #3: yknow what? yea i trust you

anxious angel: if???

dino boy: Yachi’s right, it wouldn’t be an if since, as previously discussed, you’d die from being short

anxious angel: ok, but if he wasn’t short?

short king #3: id probably die from being to cool

kags: Otherwise known as to many volleyballs to the face

yoosung: It bothers me that, even after covering it multiple times, you two don’t know the difference between two, too, and to

short king #3: thats the same word three times but ok

yoosung: No but that’s the thing

yoosung: It isn’t

dino boy: If they can’t figure it out now, they’ll never figure it out

anxious angel: i believe in you guys!

kags: Ok thats a bad idea

short king #3: ill do it!

kags: Ill do it before you can!

dino boy: You two share a single brain cell and it was beaten out of Kageyama when Hinata served a ball into the back of his head

anxious angel: sorry, he did what?

yoosung: Oh! You weren’t here yet, but neither were Nishinoya-san or Asahi-san

short king #3: i thought we were done with this

dino boy: Bold of you to assume we’ve ever moved on from anything

kags: Youve seemed to move on from being bullied by a middle blocking monster clown

dino boy: Again

dino boy: Bold of you to assume we’ve ever moved on from anything

yoosung: Tsukki, this is the nicest you’ve ever been!

anxious angel: yea, that’s true!

short king #3: wooaah

dino boy: I’m so very glad that you’re all within eye shot if I slightly turn my head when serving

yoosung: Ennoshita would love to switch spots, I’m his favorite uwu

kags: Get out and never come back here you bastard

anxious angel: uwu

kags: Holy hell wtf is wrong with you sorry excuse for humans

dino boy: I guess we’ve found the king’s weakness, other than flat-assed setters

short king #3: ahaha

short king #3: owo

**kags has left the chat**

dino boy: Heaven is a place on Earth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I haven't been posting because online school is really something. There's a lot going on and not many people know how it's working, so I've been trying to figure that out. On top of that, I've been a lot more anxious recently and couldn't focus on writing. I'll be working on some other stuff while writing this and maybe post those soon! Thank you guys for being so patient with me!


	13. an irreversible error

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short king #3: im on a train
> 
> anxious angel: excuse me?
> 
> short king #3: im on my way to tokyo
> 
> dino boy: Good riddance, take the king with you next time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, let's altogether pretend there wasn't a gap between each of the chapters, what do you say? ngl school is a lot more than i thought it would be this year but whatever time i get to write this is really fun, thank y'all for reading and such.

**short king #3 has added kags to the chat**

short king #3: i think i did a bad thing

anxious angel: letting your sister fall into a toilet kind of bad or getting stuck in a window kind of bad?

yoosung: No, I think he means getting the Karasuno first years in trouble by influencing us with the horrible idea of adding other school third years to the chat

dino boy: I would argue his entire existence, mostly stressed on the ABC song time in life

kags: Im going to guess its on the same level as the u*u thing

dino boy: The what?

kags: When he said o*o

dino boy: You’re so stupid

short king #3: guys no u dont get it

short king #3: im on a train

anxious angel: excuse me?

short king #3: im on my way to tokyo

dino boy: Good riddance, take the king with you next time

yoosung: Tsukki! No!

kags: Go to hell

dino boy: I'm ready there, hence the request for you to skip town

anxious angel: you guys, hinata is having a crisis

yoosung: Hinata, are you okay?

short king #3: snipe

short king #3: *nope

dino boy: How badly did you spell 'nope' in the first place?

short king #3: hear me out

short king #3: I can iether continue what im doing and confess to kenma or just go to bokuto-san's house

anxious angel: hinata

anxious angel: i'm getting anxious for you

yoosung: Me too

yoosung: Please tell me you called ahead

kags: I bet he didnt hes that dumb

short king #3: shut it!!

dino boy: Well? Did you?

short king #3: wouldnt u like to know

anxious angel: hinata…

yoosung: Why don’t you call him right now?

kags: I cant sbeve your on the starting line up

dino boy: I can’t *believe I had to read that sentence

short king #3: shhh im gonna call him

yoosung: He can’t hear us??? We’re texting???

  
  
  


Hinata placed his phone by his ear, his stomach churning the way it used to before matches. It rang once before Kenma picked up.

“Hey, Shoyou,” He said, faint music and beeping playing in the background.

“Hi, Kenma,” Hinata responded.

It was quiet for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. He just needed to ask if he could visit, right?

“Can I come over today?” He asked, knee bouncing as he waited for the reply.

Kenma hummed before saying, “Kuroo is coming over in a bit, probably to sleepover, so you can come if you don’t mind that.”

Of course there would be something in his way, but it wasn’t like he could do anything now. He was already on the train. 

“Shouyou?”

“Yep!” He exclaimed, earning a few glances from other passengers. “Yeah, I don’t mind! I’ll be there in thirty minutes, I think.”

“Thirty minutes? It usually takes an hour,” Kenma commented.

There was another stretch of silence, this time less stressful. 

“Well, I’ll see you then! Bye, Kenma!” He quickly hung up just as Kenma began to speak.

  
  
  


anxious angel: i hope kenma picks up

dino boy: I hope he doesn’t 

kags: I dont care what happens

yoosung: That’s cool but I do and I’ll cry if it doesn’t work out

anxious angel: me too tbh

dino boy: I can’t believe I’ll have to find a therapist for you emotional wrecks

kags: Ugh i want one

dino boy: Get it yourself, I don’t have that much money 

short king #3: i told you guys not to talk while im gone!!!

yoosung: Hinata! How’d it go?

short king #3: yeah!

anxious angel: yeah?

short king #3: im going over there!

dino boy: What information are you withholding right now?

short king #3: kuroo-san is going to be there and i think kenma knows im already on the train

kags: The train thing doesnt matter

kags: Kuroo-san is going to be there?

kags: How do you think your going to confess?

anxious angel: why don’t you do it on a different day then?

short king #3: im like on a train rn

yoosung: You said you could go to Bokuto-san’s house??

short king #3: that was a lie i dont know where his house is 

dino boy: Jesus

dino boy: I pray for Kenma for having to deal with you in the future

yoosung: Tsukki, does that mean you believe Kenma will say yes?

dino boy: Shut up, Yamaguchi

dino boy: It just means I’m not blind. Kenma literally seeks Hinata out, it’s insane

kags: You wear glasses you are blind

anxious angel: that isn’t how it works-

dino boy: Glasses help me see, genius. Even if I was legally blind, the glasses make it so I can see

short king #3: im so confused whats happening

yoosung: Nothing, we’re just waiting with you until it’s time

kags: Its so boring 

dino boy: Talking in this chat dissolves my brain cells

anxious angel: i’m convinced we share brain cells

short king #3: i have all of them

yoosung: No offense Hinata, but if you had even a quarter of a brain cell you wouldn’t be in your current situation 

short king #3: no offense yamaguchi but if you had a brain cell you wouldnt have ran into asahi-san

kags: No one here has brain cells

anxious angel: i think i have one

short king #3: u have like 80 your so smart

yoosung: Yachi probably gains a brain cell everyday and gives them out as charity 

kags: I want one 

dino boy: No

short king #3: its ok kageyama ill give u one 

kags: Weve already said you dont have one whatever dead cell your trying to give me wont work and i dont want it

yoosung: I mean you didn’t have to say all that-

anxious angel: guys please brain cells aren’t transferable like that, no need to argue

dino boy: They’re like cavemen

short king #3: whathow

dino boy: ^

short king #3: i hate it here and on the train im surrounded by traitors and bullies with no escape you can go break your kneecaps while i suffer from your rude actions

dino boy: No thanks <3

kags: Hinata your almost there right

short king #3: yea i gotta zoom in like 2 mins

yoosung: Ok, then I’m going to head off now

yoosung: Good luck Hinata!!!

short king #3: mkay thanks!!!

kags: We can leave now?

anxious angel: you could leave whenever, we’re just being good friends and supporting hinata

dino boy: Wtf we are? Ew no bye 

short king #3: good riddance

kags: Bye 

kags: Dont be dumb it gets tiring watching you and kenma act stupid

anxious angel: wise words 

anxious angel: i agree

short king #3: shhh

short king #3: bye kageyama

short king #3: i gotta go now bye yachiii

anxious angel: bye hinata!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for that cliffhanger lol i'm still writing the next chapter so apologies, this is gonna take a bit. i might be able to crank out a bokuto-konoha birthday chapter and i'm planning on doing a seijoh one too, but the priority is the next part of this kenhina mess.  
> 


	14. bokuto and konoha's birthday gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yukkipe renamed the chat to Bo and Konoha get over here
> 
> kononoha: you could just send a text
> 
> kononoha: you know
> 
> kononoha: like a normal person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, before part 2 of the kenhina mess i wanted to post something for both bokuto and konoha's birthdays and im a fukurodani stan so i naturally wanted a chapter just for them lol i promise the other one is coming though!

**yukkipe renamed the chat to Bo and Konoha get over here**

kononoha: you could just send a text

kononoha: you know

kononoha: like a normal person

komeanie: is this a bokuto konoha only thing or am i allowed?

sarusaru: yukie doesn’t have the power to stop me

kononoha: not yukie literally dipping the moment i came here

washy: Maybe it was on purpose

komeanie: lmao yes

bestest ace: yukkipe!! im here!!

yukkipe: great i have an announcement 

kononoha: why didn’t you say anything when i arrived???

yukkipe: what part of “Bo and Konoha” wasn’t clear 

yukkipe: anyways

yukkipe: i only have enough money for one gift you guys figure out what you want to share

yukkipe: i can make something if you want idk 

bestest ace: as the oldest

kononoha: 10 damn days

bestest ace: 10 days that count

bestest ace: n e ways

bestest ace: as the oldest

washy: Were we always allowed to give one gift for the two of them?

sarusaru: yeah have i been wasting my hard earned money for two years?

onaggy: perks of being a first year

kononoha: ok since bokuto is still typing 

kononoha: please do my homework for me

yukkipe: no next request

bestest ace: please do MY homework for me

yukkipe: no 

yukkipe: next request

kononoha: please do our homework for us

bestest ace: aw konoha ur including me!!!

bestest ace: i love you to!!

yukkipe: im glad you two are friends

yukkipe: again 

yukkipe: no

pwetty setter: Almost 40 notifications

pwetty setter: It’s 5:00 a.m

pwetty setter: What could possibly have everyone awake?

bestest ace: akaaaashiiii!!!

pwetty setter: Yes?

bestest ace: yukkipe can only get konoha and me one gift to share what should we get

pwetty setter: Have you asked about homework?

yukkipe: this team has one brain and akaashi apparently doesnt have it

yukkipe: im not doing shit for anyone’s homework those notes i gave you both is the best you’re getting 

kononoha: you said you’ll make food correct?

yukkipe: yeah man

kononoha: alright can i have fried chicken please and thank you

bestest ace: I DIDNT SEE YOUD MAKE US FOOD

bestest ace: can u maybe do yakiniku

yukkipe: yknow id love to do that but i only have two hands and one of them is currently occupied with manager stuff 

yukkipe: choose between those two or find smth else

bestest ace: as the oldest,,,

kononoha: no stfu

komeanie: ooo konoha said no no to bokuto

sarusaru: oooo bokuto you’re in trouble

pwetty setter: Bokuto-san, we can go out and get yakinku together

kononoha: bruh who’d gonna get fried chicken with me

washy: Alright

sarusaru: for that quick of a reply it lacks any excitement 

suzukazoo: jfc

bestest ace: oops

suzukazoo: Why are there so many notifications from this chat alone??

pwetty setter: They’re arguing over gifts

yukkipe: we’re discussing, akaashi-kun

komeanie: it’s very peaceful

sarusaru: yeah no one’s actually flat out said fuck

washy: Not flat out, no

onaggy: it’s a really polite conversation 

kononoha: ok, well i’m ok with discussing and deciding on something together bokuto

kononoha: something we both agree on

bestest ace: we can just hang out together!!

bestest ace: itll be fun!!!

bestest ace: you yukkipe me and akaashi!!

kononoha: whatever that’s cool with me ig

yukkipe: thirty minutes

yukkipe: i’ve waited thirty minutes for you two to decide 

yukkipe: that you want to hangout with me

bestest ace: yup!!!

yukkipe: well the logic is there to me im cool with this

pwetty setter: Why is this school this way?

komeanie: says you mister i wanna play with a star

kononoha: ^

bestest ace: whats happening 

pwetty setter: Nothing, Bokuto-san

sarusaru: lol not this

suzukazoo: Coach Yamiji and I are equally confused about this, no worries 

yukkipe: yes worries 

suzukazoo: Alright

washy: I wish I was out of the loop on this one

onaggy: me too

yukkipe: wait what’s the specifics on this hangout

kononoha: we can meet up at a cafe or smth

bestest ace: or my house

kononoha: no your siblings suck

pwetty setter: They’re not even in middle school yet

kononoha: i hate the entire bokuto family except your mom she gets a pass

sarusaru: i bet bokuto’s mom hates you

komeanie: i don’t need to bet i know bokuto’s siblings hate you

washy: Bokuto’s siblings hate god

sarusaru: you ok washio?

bestest ace: my siblings didnt do anything!!!

pwetty setter: I have to agree with Bokuto-san, his siblings aren’t bad at all

kononoha: akaashi, you’ve never had a three year old girl attempt to tear out your hair while a one year old boy throws shit at you and it shows

pwetty setter: I wasn’t here for that, it has no affect on me whether you get bullied by toddlers

yukkipe: he said: rip to you but im different

bestest ace: ALRIGHT

bestest ace: so we arent going to my house i get it

kononoha: we can just go to a mall and walk around

yukkipe: im good with that

pwetty setter: I am too

komeanie: hey wait im coming 

komeanie: i dont want any inside jokes happening 

sarusaru: this is something we can invite ourselves to? im in

onaggy: If basically the entire team is going I’m going too

washy: Me too

suzukazoo: I’m going as a chaperone

sarusaru: is it weird to invite coach yamiji?

pwetty setter: On many levels, yes

komeanie: oh its weird to invite him but it isnt to randomly talk to about a star

sarusaru: smh my head

pwetty setter: If the conversation is done, I’m leaving 

kononoha: you guys actually embarrassed akaashi out 

bestest ace: akaaahiii!! wait!!!

bestest ace: lets meet at that one convenience store!!

pwetty setter: Ok, I’ll be there in ten mins roughly

bestest ace: im already there 

sarusaru: bye losers

komeanie: im no loser

komeanie: bye suckers

kononoha: im not a sucker??

kononoha: bye bitches

yukkipe: stopping this chain before it escalates further 

suzukazoo: Good, thank you

Washy: Bye then

onaggy: yeah bye guys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright! i also wanted to mention here that i have an art account on instagram (@goshikiwii) that hit 100 followers so my friend and i are going live on saturday (9/26) 12:30 CDT. little promo for that as i also posted something for bokuto and konoha there! anyways, as i said earlier, kenhina is coming!! it is i promise!!


	15. an irreversible error: date time~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kenma!!!: hey shouyou, we’re going to some restaurant rn
> 
> kenma!!!: we can pick you up from the station and head over there
> 
> shouyou: ok! 
> 
> shouyou: see you and kuroo-san soon!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all,,, i am so sorry i haven't updated this in a while. between school, mental health, and just a bunch of family stuff i really couldn't finish this part. i decided to just upload it in parts as i finish each thing because i think you guys might wanna see it, i don't wanna overthink it anymore, and i feel better when i update. hopefully i can get the rest out soon as it's a bit more than halfway there!!

kenma!!!: hey shouyou, we’re going to some restaurant rn

kenma!!!: we can pick you up from the station and head over there

shouyou: ok! 

shouyou: see you and kuroo-san soon!!!

  
  


Kuroo walked behind Kenma who had been leading the way forward, surprisingly.

“He said he’s right outside the entrance but didn’t say where or anything. His orange hair is the only thing helping him,” Kenma said, glancing at his phone.

“He’s just a kid from the country, he doesn’t know,” Kuroo joked as he stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets.

Kenma looked up at that and then to his friend, visibly annoyed and confused as he said, “You’re only two years older.”

“Age is just a number, Kenma.”

“You sound like a pedophile.”

“What? I do not!” Kuroo sputtered.

The conversation continued with light banter while they walked to the station. The entrance came into view, only a few students and some business men walking around.

“I don’t see Shouyou,” Kenma said, tilting his head a bit.

“He’s probably farther in, then. The kid’s small, y’know.”

Once the station was entirely visible, it was clear that Hinata was in fact not there. People milled around, parking bikes and coming in from the ticket gates as cars drove by. Groups of teens walked by, laughing far too loudly for Kenma’s comfort. Other than the usual crowd, there was no orange haired boy.

“Try calling him,” Kuroo suggested, gesturing to Kenma’s phone.

The shorter boy nodded and tapped a few things before bringing the phone up to his ear. It rang for a couple of seconds before going to voicemail. Kenma hung up before the beep.

“He’s probably still inside,” Kenma said, eyebrows creased. 

Kuroo nodded and started to pace across the entrance, peering into the station.

“I don’t think we should go inside in case he’s already heading out or something, we don’t want him to get lost out here,” He called out.

Kenma hummed and leaned against one of the pillars, watching as his friend continued to make a valiant effort to look inside. He sent a text out to Hinata, simply reading ‘where are you’, before pocketing his phone. 

Kuroo joined him shortly, shoulder pressed against the other side of the pillar so that he was next to the setter. 

Kenma let out a sigh as he fiddled with his hoodie strings. It wasn’t that he was worried for Hinata, there was always the possibility that he hadn’t arrived yet. But still, from the stories that had been recounted to him over calls and texts, it was natural to think something happened. It wasn’t like he could encounter some big villain in the bathroom here, though.

He thought about sending another text. However, the idea of coming off as impatient or too eager was very strong. He just needed to wait, which was a little harder than he thought it would be.

"He could've fallen asleep," Kuroo said, breaking the silence.

Kenma shook his head, toying with the string of his hoodie.

"He sounded pretty energetic on the phone. I doubt he’d just sleep and not wake up as soon as the train stopped.”

"Oh, I forgot that you were the Hinata expert," Kuroo teased, a grin on his face as he nudged Kenma's shoulder.

The blond haired boy looked up, squinting, but chose not to respond. While he wouldn't say it outloud- actually, while he wouldn't say it to Kuroo, he did know some stuff about Shouyou. They  _ were  _ good friends, after all.

And Kenma wasn't stupid or oblivious, he was the so called 'brain' of the team for a reason. He had a fondness for Hinata, he felt a bit nervous but excited when talking to him, he really just wanted to hold his hands, etc.

He would admit to anyone (minus Kuroo out of spite) that he had a crush on Hinata. And he would also go as far to assume that it was mutual.

When a short, orange haired kid burst out of the station, huffing, both Nekoma students jumped up.

"Oi, Chibi-chan!" Kuroo called, waving. "What took you so long?"

Hinata grinned, seemingly in relief, when he saw them and ran over.

“Sorry! My phone died and when I got out of the train some guy stopped me and asked where my parents were,” He explained, rubbing the back of his neck.

Kenma covered his mouth as he snorted. He couldn’t help it, Shouyou was just too… Shouyou.

“We’re going out to eat right?” Hinata asked, shrugging his backpack on one shoulder, “I didn’t bring my wallet, so, uh,” He trailed off.

Kuroo waved a hand, eyes closed with a lazy grin. “I can p-”

“I’ll pay for you, Shouyou,” Kenma interrupted, unbothered by the taller teen’s shocked silence followed by a snicker.

“Thanks, Kenma!” 

Kenma smiled slightly and pushed a strand of hair behind his ear, muttering a “no problem” as he pulled his PSP out.

“Ooh! That’s the really hard game, right? Did you ever beat that level, the one where you’re supposed to go-” Hinata punched up before jumping and doing what seemed like an attempt at a kick “-like that?”

“You’re such a character, Chibi-chan,” Kuroo ruffled Hinata’s hair, shaking his head. 

“Ah, yeah, it is,” Kenma nodded, ignoring the exchange, “I managed to get it done last night. I had to go back a few levels and collect some leftover coins and then watch a couple of cutscenes.”

Shouyou nodded, the collected knowledge from numerous hangouts paying off in the moment. Kenma decided not to correct the inconsistencies with the explanation Hinata gave earlier, the shorter boy seemed happy to have remembered it.

"Where are we going to eat, by the way?" Kenma said, eyes still trained on his game.

"You kids and your video games-"

"If you utter the phrase 'back in my day' I won't hesitate to shove this PSP in your throat and sue you for property damage." 

Hinata laughed as Kuroo put his hands up, a smug looking grin still on his face.

“There’s a Thai restaurant around here,” Kuroo vaguely gestured with his head, “I’m going over to Kai’s later with Yaku and they wanted me to get them papaya salad or something.”

Kenma nodded and the conversation was over as they walked, the third year’s phone guiding them.

Hinata was, in the simplest words, nervous as hell.

Maybe it was obvious by his silence, maybe the Nekoma students noticed how he played with the zipper of his volleyball club jacket, maybe he was overthinking it. Actually, he was overthinking it, the rest of those were maybe’s.

The worst part of it was the fact that both Kuroo and Kenma were very smart, smart enough to notice all the little things about Hinata’s interactions with Kenma. They were also smart enough to notice that he wasn’t talking Kenma’s ear off like usual, though, and-

Oh no, would they notice that?

“Kenma!” Hinata exclaimed. 

Both of the older boys jumped at the shout, Kenma the most. It very much resembled a cat getting the shock of its life, the only thing missing was falling over dramatically.

“How, uh, how was your day?” He continued.

Kenma raised an eyebrow and glanced at Hinata before shrugging.

“It’s better now that you’re here, I guess.”

Hinata blushed and Kuroo made some gagging noise followed by a yelp as Kenma elbowed him.

"How about you?" Kenma returned the question.

"Ah, it's been um," there was a word Tsukishima taught him, what was it? Hairy, heavy, something along those lines.

The setter glanced to his side and took in the confused and honestly quite stressed look on his face.

"Hectic?" He supplied.

"Yes! Hectic, my day has been hectic!" Hinata snapped, a grin forming on his face. "Are you a psychic?"

"Don't ask him that, when I used to ask him he shoved me into the net," Kuroo advised.

He pocketed his phone which had been guiding them and opened the door to what Hinata assumed was the restaurant.

  
  
  


"Women and children first," He joked to his unamused audience.

Still, the younger two of the group went inside.

"Where are we sitting?" Hinata asked, looking around the restaurant.

"That table looks good," Kenma pointed out a booth in the corner of the room, a dimmed out light settled instead of the bright bulbs on the other tables.

"That one?" Kuroo groaned, "but it's so dark and-"

"Ok!" Shouyou exclaimed, taking hold of Kenma's wrist and guiding him to the chosen seat.

Kuroo sighed and followed them, deciding to slide into the seat across from the two. He truly was chaperoning a date.

Once he pulled out his phone to text the other Nekoma third years, however, he felt two pairs of eyes watching him.

"What?"

"What'cha doing?" Hinata asked innocently, but the fact that a pair of eyes were pointedly staring at the mobile device was clear.

Kuroo felt like a child at a family dinner. Was he not allowed to use his phone? Kenma was on his console though, they wouldn't be singling him out for something so out of nowhere.

"I'm texting my friends," He replied cautiously, 

"I thought we were your friends," Kenma, The Bastard, said without moving his eyes up from the screen, a small smile on his face.

'They're practically boyfriends already,' Kuroo thought exasperatedly. ‘Out to annoy me together.’

He continued to text because he wasn’t going to back down from people who were still in the five foot range.

He glanced up a few times, seeing Hinata practically draped over Kenma’s shoulders while he played. To be honest, the middle blocker wished he didn’t have to be there but Kenma would probably freak out if he left him alone. On the other hand, Kenma might deserve it.

He continued to look up from his device and saw just how comfortable Kenma was, something that was hard for him to get with people he hadn’t known for a long time. He couldn’t leave if Kenma was enjoying himself so much, he’d just be a bad friend.

Well, that settled it then. He was gonna get those two idiots together by the end of the day, to end his suffering and their’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry again you guys!! i'll try to get the next part (or parts) done soon <3

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me if y'all liked this or not! I literally will die without any comments, say anything and I promise you I'll read it.


End file.
